Actress Aisha Tyler has made it no secret that she is unable to have children. She also has not made it a secret that until recently, she never wanted them. In an interview with Nancy Redd of The Huffington Post she said that she wanted to let women know that if they want to choose their careers over having children, that is a perfectly acceptable choice.
It seems like everyone these days has someone telling them that they need to have a child. Many people feel that the only way your life can be complete is if you create a life. However for some, that just is not a reality. Some people do not want children and that is a perfectly valid and legitimate choice. Many do not agree with this choice. They berate those who would rather have a career and independence as opposed to starting a family. Why is it the most important thing in life to have a child? Wouldn’t that be worse for everyone involved if someone had a child when they were not ready or didn’t want one?
Tyler said that ever since her career started taking off she knew that she did not want children. She was having a great time working and always considered herself to be a professional woman, not a mother. After she got married she and her husband began to discuss having children. They realized they didn’t have much time left and so they began trying to have a baby. After months of not being able to conceive they went to the doctor. They were told that it may never happen unless they intervened with IVF (in-vitro fertilization) or fertility drugs. Tyler knew that this was not something that she wanted to do. It is expensive and heartbreaking as most of the women that have IVF treatments do not ever get pregnant.
She stated that all too often we focus on the happy ending stories where the couple is able to conceive with a medical intervention but that is actually a very slim possibility even with the drugs. She and her husband are okay with the fact that they cannot have children and did not want to get stuck in the endless loop of medical appointments and disappointments. She is happy with her life as it is and wants everyone to know that they shouldn’t feel pressured to have children if they do not want to.