Do fatherless homes cause black children to struggle?



Nomalanga discusses the impact of fatherless homes on the black community.

She is speaking specifically about a man who had 21 kids by the age of 29 years old.  The story is sad, since we know that his kids are going to have a difficult and fatherless life, as their dad will spend most of his time trying to get other women pregnant.

But what about the guy who has five kids with four women, or six kids with three women?  Are they helping or harming their kids by sprinkling their seed all over the place?  Nomalanga says that we have to think about how we breed and what lives we bring into the world.

Speaking in a clear and supportive fashion, Nomalanga presents the kind of realistic perspective that the black community needs.  If we don’t find ways to control out-of-wedlock births, we’re going to see that our kids are the ones who lose.

The video is below:

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  1. In one a word answer “yes”, the real question is are “Black Women” the solution to or the cause of the pervasive cultural trend

  2. I haven’t listen to the video yet, but I am not clueless to the title.

    #1. Most black-women are doing what they feel they have no other choice to do because most black-men, with the exception of a small few have put them in the position where they’ve had no other choice to take this road of single parenting because they want 100% black babies and they refuse to step outside the black race and explore many other options that are open and totally made available to them.

    Racism and brainwash Color-blind ignorance is what’s destroying our people, so this is not just a magnifying the black-women under the eye of the needle issue. It always takes two to tango…

    A woman can still be a single parent with the children’s father in the home (I WAS ONE)… especially when the father is dysfunctional (NOT MENTALLY THERE)… Yes my children were affected, and yes they were affected when we separated, but to have stayed in the marriage would have really destroyed all of us in the worst way.
    Children are delicate creatures, even the best households with 2 parents have issues that effect their children and doesn’t show up until their adult life. (If anyone says its not so their lying).
    People need to get real and stop perpertraiting and making empty statements like it doesn’t affect them, it affects all of us.

    Ain’t nobody better then the next!!! God’s got the last word, so be so careful how you point your fingers.

    • I believe the issues in the African American community are far from 1 dimenional or 1 sided in fault. The same women having children with a “Man” with 21 children are the same woemn calling a Man who went on to college or one gets up at 5:00 Am every morning to head out to a job in a plant a “square” or as a sister on this very blog called me an “out of touch republican” because my parents and grand parents were married till “death do us part” and I was married & out of college when I had my 1 and only son. Like I did something wrong in the African American culture by her standards, so what chance did a brother have in keeping a long term relationship with a sister like that. Why are women not held to task for the relationship & co-parental choices they make & why are so few Brothers having the majority of the children out of wedlock & leaving the family unit

      • @AL Hill II…

        Nobody can answer that question and answer it fairly because there are a million and one short-story scenarios. Everybody, blackmen & blackwomen have fallen short.
        Generational curses are real. The sins of our forefathers will fall on the 1st, 2nd, 3rd and 4th generation… it is what it is. We will never have the answers to the solutions we are searching for because of pride, ignorance to except change, ignorance to except responsibility for one-self, and ignorance to except out true identity, its just endless self-massacre…

        My youngest son 24 yrs old (Military) has been called a “SQUARE” by young black females since he was in high school to the present. WHY? because he walks around with his head held high, his pants pulled up, he respects the blackwoman, he does not have a perverted mentality, he wears sketchers and not Air-Head Jordans, you can finish the rest.
        My daughters, aunts, nieces with the exception of one, school friends and many many more blackwomen I know on a personal level “DO NOT” fit the profile of negativity most blackmen are raggin on these days. I don’t exactly point the finger, I just fight back because of the shallow ignorance of our people on both sides of the fence.

        • Your son is a man! many of these girls out here don’t know what aman looks like.They know boys who spread sperm and thats about all thier about.

          • @Fred Sims…

            I have to agree with you totally, and I know for a fact its because most of them don’t know any better, they haven’t been taught. My son is always approached by women of all ages and different races, even some asking him to marry them. They say he’s different, they call him peculiar, they call him strange, but he’s one sexy intelligent strong black-man who loves the Lord and I’m his smiling proud black-mother… Strippers love to talk to him even though he lets them know he don’t want a lap-dance and he’s not giving them any money, he’s just hanging out with his crew. When it comes to my children I’m a very very blessed woman, I sleep well at night.

            The bottom-line is: I raised my sons, but I knew when it came to certain situations in their life only a man could teach a boy to be a man, so I called on God to do that task, you better believe “GOD Himself” took on that task and he is still fathering my children to this very day.
            We do not serve a weak God. Many of us have not because we ask not… Many of us ask and don’t receive because we really don’t believe what we are asking for.

            Our children are in trouble because they have not been taught, they have not been taught about their true creator, they’ve been taught “RELIGION” not God… They are apart of the lost sheep that God is bringing back to the fold, so people better watch who their judging and putting their mouths on, because many of these babies are innocent no matter how bad their situations might be in our eyes. Our children are watching us, they’ve been watching us all the time…wink!!! Its too much going on to be pointing fingers and labeling our black babies as Ba$tards. It ain’t the babies fault the mother and father had a one nightstand so it’s name should become “Ba$tard Baby”…really!!! The baby’s innocent and that baby belongs to God.

    • maria kline on

      I with u on what u are saying it’s up to us to make a good life but many find it hard to do so. We just got to make sure that our children can do and do better then us.

    • Your opinion is shared by 73% of black women with [email protected]$tard kids. Im married and my family members are married. The blame lies with the black woman that decides to have a baby with a man that isn’t her husband. In the United States abortion is legal. It only takes one to go into the abortion clinic. it only takes one woman to carry a baby for 9 months. I don’t have any sympathy for black women and their fatherless kids. People have sex everyday and manage to not get pregnant. This is just carelessness on the black woman’s behalf. I bet if the government stopped section 8 ,and cut off foodstamps to single women babies born out of wedlock would decrease. Why have a baby that you cant feed?

      • @Toyabg…
        Excuse me!!! none of my chiidren were born bastards even though me and their father ended up divorced in the end. I know many black-women who started out married then had their children, then the divorce came… So are you calling us the 73%???

        • No I’m not . I’m referring to a woman that was never married. I’m not speaking of divorced women. I no that all marriages don’t work. I just think our black boys deserve to have a father in their lives. We are losing so many of them to the system.

          • @Toyabg…
            I agree with you also, but what I don’t agree with is breaking down a young man who made it over the hurdle of not having a father in the home. Gerry made a profound positive statement about his life and not having a father. He should be applauded, praised, encouraged and lifted up because he chose to be a strong minded young black-man about his situation instead of klinging to the negative. If you and AL Hill II can’t comprehend that, yall got some real serious issues going on within yourselves.

      • Oh!!! Ms. Toy, and let me not forget, all of my brothers and family members are all married with children to black-woman. I didn’t come from a broken home, so we are on two different levels here.
        You sound like you live in every blackwomans home and you’ve peep’d in on every black-womans business under the [email protected] sun. Black folks need to step up off white-folks research & media statistics.
        Chemistry Lab Brain-Dead Black Community

      • Definition Of A Bastard:
        Per Toyabg (IN YOUR OWN WORDS):Your opinion is shared by 73% of black women with [email protected]$tard kids.



        God’s definition of a true “[email protected] Child” is one without God, one who does not know God, one who does not know their true creator, therefore there is no true relationship between God and them / aka:man…

        *My God is a bad mamma-jamma…

      • To All You Perfect Donkey’s Absent Of Skeletons In Your Closets…
        I’m sick of “ALL YOU SPIRITUALLY CLUELESS [email protected] FOOLS” who refer to our black babies as “[email protected] Kids”… that’s right I called you a bunch of “[email protected]” because all you speak is poison & curses from your “[email protected] Lips” upon the heads of our black seed who are our future.
        You “JUDGE” people with no “FACTS”… You judge people when “YOU” haven’t even heard from God about their situation therefore you have neither insight nor discernment whatsoever concerning their lives as an individual…

        ***Please share some of your own personal trumatic issues and experiences with the crowd / what’s that I hear!!! SILENCE!!! I thought so…

        • I judge black women and their [email protected][email protected] kids by all the destruction they have cause in the black community. I think that a lot of black women are without morals. Men only do what a woman allows. If a woman has a mans kid ,and washes his drawls why marry her? I wouldn’t want a woman with a house full of [email protected][email protected]’kids. This is only for women that haven’t married and have kids. If u want to take on the cause of defending babymama’s be my guest.

          • @toyabg…

            Its not about defending babies mamas!!! “2 WRONGS DON’T MAKE A RIGHT”, both party’s are immoral (MALE & FEMALE)… either your going to look at these situations through the eyes and revelation of God or your not / until BM & BW do, change will never come… right now its just a bunch of [email protected] screaming and hollering back & forth with no solutions and the black community boat continue to sink.

            “SIN IS SIN” / no matter how you look at it, and the wages of “SIN” is death. If you being a BM go before the judgement God and start blasting the BW for having all these “Black-Babies” out of wedlock, what the h*ll do you believe God’s going to tell you? I’ll make it easy for you!!!

            *God is going to say: *WHAT PART DID YOU PLAY IN IT…. Now there’s your answer because its going to keep coming around until all parties get it right… Calling black babies “Ba$tards” & acting like “Finger Pointing Jacka$$es” is nothing but a dead-end street going nowhere / 2 bulls bumping heads, horns get stuck and they die like that: SELF MASSACRE IN THE BLACK COMMUNITY…

          • @toyabg…

            Per your words: *(Men only do what a woman allows).

            Hummm… Tell me something TOYABG! Does that make the man “RIGHT”? Are you telling me (black-men don’t know wrong from right)? and its ok for them to destroy just because they don’t carry the womb? Are you saying its ok for the BM to use the BW’s vagina as a garbage disposal dumping ground just because yall donkey’s got a [email protected] hard-on that hurts and you’d rather play games to dump instead of taking a cold shower and being the better respectable gentlemen that your God requires you to be??? Really!! now if anybody wants to talk about backwards / that’s some backwards a$$ shyt…wink!

  3. My father not being around didn’t affect my life. I made up in my mind that I wouldn’t let it. It was my choice not to even entertain his absence!

    • Amen!!!!

      Now that’s what I’m talking about… finally some strong sense of self has shown up on the scene with no excuses just being a strong positive blackman inspite of…. God bless you Gerry!!!

    • A Fathers presence or absence is no guarantee of anything but as a man & father who was raised by a strong loving Mother & Father in a neighborhood of the same. I appreciate the example of a strong hard working father who taught me to work on cars, around the house & in the lawn & treated my son like he was made of Gold. You stated you don’t entertain thoughts of your absent father but made no mention of the Father or Man you have become or its effect there. Notice how “Black Women” Cheerleader with you that “we don’t need any Fathers” then in the next breath ridicule “Black Men” for giving them what they want. Brother put more thought into the world your in

    • Notice how “Black Women” Cheerleader with you that “we don’t need any Fathers” then in the next breath ridicule “Black Men” for giving them what they want.

      I see a real strong black-woman got to break-down her articulation cause some people only “THINK” with one side of their brain.

      Gerry Redbone is applauding and praising you for being a strong-minded positive willful black-man who is not wallowing in self-pitty, who is not cutting himself short out of life because he didn’t have a father in the home.
      My youngest son was only 6 yrs old when me and his father divorced. He is 23 yrs old, officer in the military, lived in Korea for 1 yr, going to school to get his degree, treats all women with respect regardless of who they are and what position their life might be in doesn’t matter, nor does it effect the direction he wants his life to go. He doesn’t sit around pointing the finger playing judge and jury concerning black-women, he just walks in positivity as a very strong leader. Gerry you sound like a strong black-man who flows in that “MAGNIFICENT ORDER”….wink! Much Love & Peace to you my brother / Redbone

      • If you were nearly as intelligent as you pretend to be you would know that 1 side of the brain controls thought & reasoning & 1 side controls artistic expression as an engineer & Jazz saxophonist I’m well aware of this. And claiming that you don’t miss something “Father” you never had doesn’t make you strong just another “sad statistic” in the African-American community

        • You love referring to yourself on a daily basis don’t you AL Hill II…

          Your nothing but a clueless sleeper, and always so [email protected] far from the truth cause all you know is lab-Rat material. You don’t even know your true identity so you can’t even make it up the darn railroad tracks just so you can cross over to the other-side for more enlighten wisdom and knowledge / bottomline: your donkey is stuck like many others.
          You have a “TIME WARP” mentality = Stale dead brain cells….

          • Your a “pretender” & a “fraud” & the more you speak the more prevalent it becomes & you wouldn’t last 5 months here on the South Side of Chicago before it had you running back to “BFE” were you belong. But be sure to express your admiration for the next brother that says “My father wasn’t there for me so why should I be there for my child” or the next black mother that tells her son “you father wasn’t there for you so why should you be there for her child”. Because that’s what I deal with the young men I mentor here daily basis but you be proud

          • @AL Hill II…

            So So Sorry for you that’s all you have is the south side of Chicago and that’s where your world ends… and I feel sorry for all the young black-men you mentor because they haven’t got a clue in this world they are being lead by a “WALKING DEAD-MAN” who has “NO-SUBSTANCE, NO-FOUNDATION, and NO DESTINY” whom’s life “ONLY” ends at the grave because you have “NO-FAITH” and you have “NO-GOD”, there for you have absolutely (NO PURPOSE BEYOND THE GRAVE) where real life begins, so that means your not even teaching those young men “PREPARATION SKILLS” for a greater life but only how to dodge a bullet and continue living in “DARKNESS” instead of coming into the light of a “HIGHER CONSCIOUSNESS” of whom they really are by the spirit of their true and living God.

            Your lost AL Hill II / so keep dodging your bullets because I need you to continue living until you find your “REAL PURPOSE” in this life which is so far beyond your weakest state at this present moment.

            *Father open our eyes so that we may “SEE”…

          • @AL Hill II…

            Huh!!! Now we know who the real “FRAUD” is… AL Hill II is intimidated by strong black-women, that’s why that sister called you an “OUT OF TOUCH REPUBLICAN”… My 23 year old son has more life in his pinky-finger then you’ll ever have in 1 decade of your own personal life. Your fighting a losing battle that you’ve already lost!!! Wake the h*ll up black-man, so hating on sisters, we are the ones who have the keys to the kingdom…wink!!! Without our wombs your days are numbered…

          • You sound has “stupid” as everyone thinks you are & as insulting to “Black Men” as any “Klansman”. I’m no “women hater” or “republicans” I’m just “country”. After my Father dated my Mother for a while in Clarksdale Mississippi my Grand Mother told him “if you want to see her again Marry her” & was till the day he died. Because relationships are about what’s good for the; community, culture & society as a whole & not your contemporary “ghetto philosophy” (what makes me happy). Your entire train of thought has failed the African-American community as a whole & rather than admit it & move forward you embrace it & try to insult anyone who doesn’t buy into it. Your way too D*mn old for all this selfishness & name calling, grow the F*ck Up & your 23 year old son should be ashamed of you my 18 year old son would be

          • @AL Hill II…
            OMG!!! Hello!! AL Hill II are you still alive out there somewhere in Chicagie-land!!! I truly hope you haven’t gone somewhere and had a stroke. I can tell by your writing you’ve allowed yourself to get all flustered up. I’m blessed because I don’t allow what people say to push me so over-board & off-the-cliff these days. Mr Hill the real fight is with-in yourself not with the Redbone. Anytime you allow anybody to get under your skin the way the Redbone just did “YOU GOT SOME SERIOUS ISSUES BLACK-MAN”… so if you can’t take the heat get your a$$ away from the fire because its very very very obvious you can’t deal with the real fire, because if you did you would understand better where the Redbone is coming from, and I will continue to stand my ground at the “GATE” with the sword in my hand waiting for you and any other black-man with your brain-dead mentality, brain-dead because that’s how you like to be.

            AL Hill II / I’m not hating on you like your hating on the black-woman… Redbone is laughing at you forreal / lol old-woman!!! really!!! you wish!!! Sorry!!! “I’M ALIVE BOO”, I live the secret to life more abundantly, what about you!!

          • Redbone only “Animals” get angry or flustered not us true “Black Men” you forget I pay attention to what you say I remember when you wrote “Marriage & the white picket fence is a facade that society has tricked us into aspiring for”, you have given up on love & marriage & are bitter & I feel sorry for you & I’m the opposite & I frustrate you. Your not a “Black Women” like my Mom & very few if any still exist. God has blessed me in many ways & I mentor in one of the countries most dangerous cities to spread that blessing. Look up an article published in “Ebony Magazine” several years ago called “Who you calling B!tch”, explains how most Black Men are taught to disrespect, abuse & curse women by their “single Mothers”. Over the past 9 years of mentoring I can’t tell you how many young Black Boys I’ve had to reprogram from their Mother’s that its never okay to “hit a women” & their Mom’s disagree “life in the Hood”. My Father would have “whooped” my A$$ if he ever heard about me striking a women

          • @AL Hill II…

            You know what AL Hill II? seriously I’m laughing at you, Redbone is not moved by much these days, when people talk shyt Redbone talk shyt back, its my thrill of the day to challenge the mind set of man because people in general, especially our people are in the dark about everything. You don’t ever have to agree with Redbone about one [email protected] thing, but one thing about the Redbone / SHE WILL ALWAYS STAND STRONG WHEN IT COMES TO GOD’S BUSINESS RATHER MAN IS ENLIGHTENED ON MY LEVEL OR NOT. *God said he sent one to “PLANT” and one to “WATER”, and I’ve planted a lot of seed that will not come back void. Bitter & angry Redbone is not, “Anointed I AM”… I see many many things in a different light then you do, that’s why we bump-heads / it is what it is. You need to learn how to lighten up and relax and stop getting so dang caught up all the time, cause it shows in your remarks & quotes. Both of us have very very valid points about many things, Redbone ain’t no dummy but I will challenge you to no end. You do pick on black-women sometimes and many of your assumptions are off.
            You don’t look deep enough into the “DARK SITUATIONS” of black-women to make a lot of the statements you and other black-men post. Have you ever once had a 4 to 6 hour POW WOW with a group of black-women to actually sit and listen to their stories of abuse which has landed so many of them into these situations of un-wedlock etc… (No you haven’t, because if you had you’d have a different tone all together). Redbone listens to men with a listen ear, I’ve also communicated with many brothers behind bars and I get much respect. You don’t know the Redbone, but I can read you 90 going north. Me and my brothers and sisters had a daddy til the day he died, he raised all 5 of us in the home along with my mother his wife. We camped we fished we traveled we did everything, wash cars, going shooting, change tires, you name it we did it… This black-women ain’t lacking nothing, not even a man.

          • @AL Hill II…
            You heard me and you heard every last word I said, and you understood every last word I said, so humble yourself accordingly and be a real man about it / stop acting like a soar loser because this is all life in the natural realm… Again you don’t have all the answers or the real true facts into other peoples lives. You ain’t God, matter of fact since I’ve seen your comments day 1 I’ve never discerned a Godly spiritual connection beaming from you… You need a connection with your God cause your “HARD as STONE”… and those young men need more then what your offering them, you need to take your business to a higher level and stop acting like your ancestors: a stuborn-stiff-neck people, for what good is your education if you are without your God.

          • The topic of this article was about how 11 women had 21 children with 1 man in his 20’s, what are you retards & “mental midgets” talking about. Why shouldn’t these women take responsibility for their actions & the “life predicament” the chose for these children. Have you heard of this thing called a job or a career & the playoffs. Wow don’t have as much free time as you guys even when I’m on vacation

  4. I was fortunate enough to grow up with a dad who was present in all regards. He nurtured me and helped to give my life direction. I never had to be a rough guy because when I was bullied my dad came to the school and discussed his concerns with those in authority.
    My dad valued education. I love books because of him. My dad went to work every day and came straight home. He loved my mother, his wife. This is what was modeled to me.
    Everyone in fatherless homes struggle. The men who are absent from the home struggle also. I have grown into a mature man in partbecause of my children. My children actually influence me. They have taught me a lot of important lessons. As the father of females I have become interested in gender equality issues and domestic violence.
    To anyone who thinks that our children are not suffering due to fatherlessness look at many of our professional athletes. They have not learned discipline or the true worth of themselves or others. I respect women because I understand the huge contributions that women in our lives. My dad taught me that. My mother’s love made my dad strong. He had a deep respect for my mother. My dad taught me robe an individual. Just about all of our professional athletes look the same, they are all covered with tattoos. Many embrace the thug life. An involved dad can counterbalance the pull of the media on their children. How many high asset people are covered with tattoos.
    Blacks will never be able to compete with other groups with out families in shambles. Racism and marginalization are realities that we face everyday, however we must make a life for ourselves and thi.k for ourselves. Wealthy people get married. In fact, some say marriage may become a thing of mostly upwardly mobile individuals. Less and less of us will get married and stay married. Our poverty rates will grow.
    One of the easiest ways to become poor and stay poor is by being a single parent. Statistics support this.
    I hope that this important topic can be discussed with less personal attacks. Attack ignorance and poverty not each other.

    • Well stated & “Bravo”, this was also my reality as was for my Father & my neighbors & family members, comforting feeling knowing he was always there for you isn’t it

  5. Al Hill II please continue to help the young brothers in whatever way u can. Our communities need nuclear families,fathers and mamas to give our babies a chance. Some black women don’t see the destruction that our youth are a part of because of parental guidance. As a race we need more black men like yourself to give continued support to our young black boys.

  6. Im a single parent with two teenage boys its all about how you raise your kids when there father was around he wasn’t worth a dam and my boys turned fine its kids need disipline and guidance through life a man is not all the answer

    • Congratulations & most honors & blessing on you all, but the question & scenario isn’t about you & the question should be poised to your boys & not you. When your car or something in your house breakdowns do you have to constantly call someone or has their father passed down his years of knowledge & experience & do you think they would enjoy the knowledge

    • @Ms dee…

      Thank you so much for your post, right on spot. It is how you raise your boys rather there is a positive male rolmodel in the home or not.
      I raised my boys / their father didn’t. I live on my knees crying snot to God pleading for their safety in this horrid society, pleading for them to have a life. I raised all of my children in a home where the spirit of God is always the head.
      God became the father of my children, my children are blessed, my sons have never been in gangs, never walk around with their pants saggin, never disrespect their mother, never hit or even think about hitting a woman cuz I’ll ring their necks myself, and all of my children are called & spiritually gifted and I’ve always been there to help and guide them through their process by God’s guidance. I’m not saying that black children don’t need a father in the house, but our black babies can’t move forward in life by graveling in the negative. Single parenting black-women are being ostersized much these days, but I can tell you one thing for sure: (many of their children are betting 1000% in the positive) and that alone speaks for itself. I was just watching the “Gabby Douglas” story, very very inspiring and off the charts. I am honored by her mothers character & hard work raising her children, even her son is a very decent honorable young blackman who didn’t have a father in the home.

      You see: People miss out on their blessings because they don’t believe God at his word.


  7. Im a little annoyed at some of the Godless posts from some of you even advocating MURDER of innocent babies. Since when do we have to be held up to white standards. Many of you are so brainwashed and have forgotten your potential that you accuse and denegrate others for some bad actions they may have done or have had happen to them.
    Are any of you helping the situation? What are you doing in your communities? You way back in the 60s when we were ALL called NIGGAS on a daily basis we banded together to HELP EACH OTHER…. what happened?
    By the way ive raised 3 sons no not married no not by choice…however these 3 BASTARDS as someone reffered to earlier are in college working 2 jobs each and 1 is going into the ministry!
    im proud God is proud. Not everything and everybody is going to hrll. Such a CRAB IN THE BARREL mentality. Why do we need the KKK? Take a look at all of your posts to each other….we will destroy ourselves instead!

    • So what your trying to say is when you were engaged fornication & having sex out of wedlock you were being “Godly” & being a civil rights activist & by having children out of wedlock you were fighting the African-American Stereotype. What do you know about the old south outside of were your local Barbecue Restaraunt is located. And what have you been smoking to associate this with “racial epitaph’s” & historic discrimination before we started having children out of “wedlock”, my parents were raised in 1950’s Mississippi & it was unacceptable

    • It aint about standards ya dumb [email protected] its about preserving and growing the two parent family, yall the only beitches that think its cute to push out babies with no husband, did you stop and think thats why Blk america stay on the losing team while other races of ppl stay winning or trying to? You think its cute that only 28% of black babies born are born to married women? Nobodh respect you nasty slores and BW like me who do sheit in order first education then good job then house then a man then marriage then kids is looked at as rare in the Blk community, then you got dumb [email protected] like the one who left her babies in the car, she shoulda done sheit right and she wouldnt be in that situation, yall are an embarrassment to the blk community and to smart decent blk women.

  8. One more note to ponder….one of the BASTARD children that one of you referred to earlier may become the 1st lady of the United States…or maybe even President.

    where is your faith!!

  9. There is no need for a woman to put herself in the position of being a single parent! As I have said time and again, women need to stop educating their behinds and start educating their minds! There are hundreds of birth control on the market today, use one! Why do you think you must have a baby by every man you jump into bed with? Women seem to know every wiggle and jiggle in the bedroom but are dumber than a rabbit when it comes to biology!
    The point is, why put yourself and the kids you bring into this world in this position, unless you are educated and have a decent paying job as a single parent, the tax payers are going to have to help you by paying part of your housing, food stamps, and babysitting and to be honest most hard working tax payers that I know are sick of paying for your one night stands! You handicap yourself and your kids!

  10. No child is a bastard…we are all Children of our heavenly father. Labels are what’s causes black children to struggle..all children.

  11. Yall know whats stupid BW having one baby they cant afford or on welfare workin for minimum wage then havin 2 or 3 more they cant afford cause they let deadbeat nuccas run up in and bust in their own cooch. You know what else is stupid, these same skanks wanna be called queens, even more stupid they expect good brothas thats got their sheit together to come and clean up their mess and raise [email protected] kids thats not theirs. Whats stupid is spendin money on them long silky yaki weaves on their head for $100 but saying they too poor to buy schools supplies for their kids or dont get they lazy azz out of bed to fix breakfast and lunch for them [email protected] kids. Whats stupid is thinking BM with something goin on even want their triflin azz. Whats stupid is saying nobody oughta judge them they stupid azz, yeah society judgin you and smart young BW dont wanna be you and smart young BM dont want you.

    Yall are [email protected] [email protected] [email protected] machine wont you squat down wont you squat down, while you do your thing on the dingaling, come on [email protected], come on [email protected]! Some BW women is the teflon don of no condom wearing ding dong.

    Now watch the [email protected] come running up in here protesting.

  12. And to the dumb slore who said her sons are okay they arent cause they didnt have the othe half of them which is there father and their father side of the family. But stupid Blk [email protected] think its cute to have [email protected] kids no wonder the world hate us and dont respect us sheit I dont respect most of yall, yall bring shame on all us BW.

  13. Psychologists say child develop their early cues about how to be a adult from their same sex parent.
    When so many are missing from the lives of young black males, what does that portend?

    Nature has established it necessary to have TWO parents. Blacks in America have made it common to have ONE and embraced it as the “new norm”. They have made was is UN natural a common status and defend it.

    (No, not speaking of those children who were born to married couples because the assumption is having had a relationship with his children even after leaving the marital home he will in some form continue to do so. At minimum the children will KNOW who he is definitively w/o having Mom to go on a reality show to take a DNA test)

    I am speaking about those children who were born as the result of a hook up, a booty call, AKA recreational sex.

    So, she has the kid but as there was barely a relationship there is no knowledge, love or affection lost between them b/c there never was any!!!
    The kid typically grows up feeling abandoned. Or desperately trying to get know/get along w his/her absent father.

    Yes, it is unnatural for children NOT to have a father, (different than a sperm donor). Hollering, and exclaiming that others “are sitting in judgment” does not dismiss this fact of nature.

    • @Anike…

      Per your words or the words of some [email protected] “Fleshly Racist Brain-dead Social Media Statistics”
      I am speaking about those children who were born as the result of a hook up, a booty call, AKA recreational ***.

      Redbone: This is a sad day these kind of issues plaque our black communities, but calling our black babies Ba$tards is not please to God at all. I don’t care how anybody looks at this whole situation, and many of us have a whole h*ll of a lot to answer for these days. Just because you were raised in a home with both parents, or divorced parents, or 2 parents shacking together for life or any other natural or un-natural situation does not give you the rights under God to call any child on the face of this earth a “BA$TARD”, and for those who continue on in this disobedience because you have absolutely no spiritual insight into the business of our creator I will that God “HEAP HOT COALS” over all yalls heads. All of you who walk in this manner are deeply enundated with the spirit of religion which is of “Witchcraft”, meaning you are operating in a witchcraft spirit because your words have power and you massacre your own people /aka: your own blood by the “CURSED WORDS” from your own lips.

      God said suffer the little children to come unto him. God said he is a father to the fatherless.

      So who in the h*ll made it a “LAW” to call our black babies “BA$TARDS” because our black community has so many issues!!! God didn’t say it / who the fk said it… Are any one of you “EGG-HEADS” perfect…!!! All thee so-called “BA$TARD BABIES” will make it into the kingdom of God before any of you finger-pointing-jacka$$ do…

  14. I do believe that it is the BW fault for the down fall of our black community… Women are the ONLY ones that can make a choice on weather or not a child will be brought into this world!! The man has NO say so at all… Therefore the BW know the situation in which the child will be raised( not speaking of married couples)… I personally know of a situation where a BW was dealing with a BM and knew that the BM didn’t want to have any kids(she was told b4 any sexual activities began) and 3 years later she became pregnant and decided to keep the child after being told several times that he didn’t want a child, couldn’t afford to raise the child like it should be and that a child wouldn’t make him marry her… But yet and still she decided to go thur with it and now finds herself raising the child alone (although he help financially)… That just crazy to me and I do believe that the child will be affected in some form or fashion down the road!!

  15. Why is it that we handle the problem from the same backward direction all the time! 29 kids from 11 women! All you can say is that he can’t afford them and he’s too young! One fact that always should stand out is ONLY A WOMAN CAN BRING A CHILD INTO THIS WORLD; ever! I know that that man didn’t want 29 kids! Men want sex and women know it! Women have other adgendas including sex! Maternal instincts, low self esteem, an attempt to get the man etc! All the lessons say that the man should wear protection and that’s true but, some women because of their agenda still wind up pregnant! Since marriage now is not a prerequisite for children (it should be), guys have sex not love! Women know this and seek love after the fact which rerely if ever works then cry innocent of an event they are at least 50% responsible for! It’s like playing the lottery! I have even heard women say that “I don’t need a man” without acknoledging that that kid does!(selfish) Who suffers; that kid and maybe the mother also! The grandparents definetly always do!

  16. I was born a ,”bastard.” I do not like that word it is pejorative. My humble beginnings have given me more fire in my belly than most people. We can allow our past to pull us down or we can learn from it. I am committed to be the best father and husband that I can possibly be. I had a family member remind me that I did not know my parents. This man failed his family and is emotionally abusive. I may not know my past but I know that if God gives me strength, I will do everything that I can to give my family a bright future.

    • @cambie

      Your a blessed good strong black-man like many others who did not have a natural father, but you’ve had God as your father carrying you through your process since day 1. Why continue labeling yourself as a curse “Ba$tard”… and its not about “IF GOD” gives you strength, God’s been giving you strength all the time.
      My son’s strive everyday not to be like their natural father, but are being taught and processed by God who is their true father according to their faith and belief. I advise them often they are no-longer under that “Generational Curse”, what you speak with your mouth “SO IT IS”… words have power, there is no straddling the fence, either you believe your God at his word or you don’t. (GOD’S WORDS ARE “LAW”)… We use words so losely, no matter how much education we have 99% of the time we are still clueless about what real truth is and what it actually really looks like in the eyes, revelation and understanding of our God because we “DO NOT” take the time nor have the patience to wait for him to answer us back. Microwave People..

  17. @Nomalanga…

    Wow!!! I’m just re-visiting some of your articles as they come accross the web. You are off the chain in your writings. I really do admire you, and its time for you to be “PROMOTED”. I read many blogs, every (EDITOR) don’t have the gift and anointing to write and seekout the truths to the answers need in our black communities. You are set apart from the rest, and some people just stick-out more then others.
    I have been relaxing and re-reading some of my posted comments on some of your articles as they come up… LMBO!!! I can’t believe some of the information I posted that came out of me… I see a lot of growth, a lot of tenacity, a lot of fun, a lot of wisdom and knowledge, and a lot of eye openning experiences into our black communities through out the USA. I’ve learned how people think on 4 different levels when it comes to the “NORTH SOUTH EAST and the WEST”, some people might beg to differ but there is a difference in the mind-set.
    One thing I notice about you: “YOU NEVER THROW BLACKWOMEN UNDER THE BUS” but you write with positive purpose / food for thought to help us continue seeking to find our way inspite of what social media, statistic, and the whole world throws at us.
    I could see you sitting in “Dr. Boyce” chair and him moving elsewhere, or even you starting your own Corporation…. Time brings about a change.

    @Nomalanga: Every since I came accross that article about (Blackwomen celebrating Fathers Day & Letter of apology to blackmen)… My spirit has been very focused on who is the best beneficial Editor on the “African American Media Blogs”, you won my vote.

    If we never ever cross paths you have been my blessing girlfriend. God does have bigger and better avenues for you my sister, just keep pushing on and always remember “GOD SEES ALL & GOD HEARS ALL”…


    Many Many Many Blessing to you my black powerful sister in Christ…

  18. We don’t really need to revisit this question or issue. Single moms are more likely to struggle than married moms. I responded to this issue twice, already. Let us talk about what we can do to become more upwardly mobile. Let’s talk about why so many black folk are covered with tats and seem not to value an education . There are two keys to increased financial stability in the African American community, more intact families and college graduates. There is nothing magical about this. Money is not the answer. Note that most professional atheletes are bankrupt a few years after retiring. Education and a deeper understanding of how our actions effect us is needed.

    • @Cambie….LMBO!!!

      Chill-out Brother! Nobody’s trying to raise the dead again lol… I’m glad I open this article up again, I never would have known that you were a positive strong blackman. I thought you were a woman… see!!

      Nomalanga and Krystal Crossman are 2 of the best “EDITORS” on the WEB-MEDIA… and sometimes we need to give credit and encouragement where it is due.

      Cambie I am also proud and enlighten to know you too even though your just a “CAMBIE” lol…wink!
      What I wouldn’t give to see some of the faces behind the mask… Be Nice Cambie PS: for a minute I was getting you and Corbin mixed up, now I just gotta figure out if Corbin is a man or a women.

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