Does Having More Money, Education Mean a Woman “Married Down”?


By Victor Trammell

In today’s America, women (black women in particular) are more educated and earning more money than they ever have in history.

With women representing a larger portion of the population, it can be hard for them to find an eligible man worth marrying who meets or surpasses their earning potential. A writer named Rachel Gabrys penned an interesting article about this subject titled, “What Happens When a Woman “Marries Down.”

In her article, which was published by, Gabry describes her own personal experiences as a career woman in a relationship with a man who has an education and earning level that is below hers. “My work is meaningful and it pays well,” Gabry writes.

“I would do it whether or not I needed the money. Other people, however, are not okay with this setup. You can see it in the questions they ask about my fiancé,” she continued. People are not okay with this setup because there is an obvious double-standard in society about gender roles in a domestic relationship between a man and woman.

Regardless of the fact that women are moving up the socioeconomic ladder, they aren’t scrutinized for deciding to be home makers instead of career women. However, a stay-at-home dad is frowned upon when his woman is the breadwinner of the household.

“No one asks a man at a dinner party how his kids are doing in school. They ask, ‘So what do you do?’ People are not okay with a man not having career ambitions, with a man not climbing the ladder. They ask if he’s planning on going back to school. They offer to set him up with an internship. They give him the card of someone they know,” Gabry went on to write.

In the same vein, men are not labeled with the “marrying down” tag when they choose a woman with less education or earning power than they have. People assume that’s the way it’s supposed to be. However, in a new world where women are earning more than men left and right, it might be time reconsider the traditinal narrative about equality and gender roles in domestic relationships between men and women.






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