News recently broke out that Dwyane Wade proposed to actress and model Gabrielle Union and she said “Yes!” Before the dust had even settled from that big announcement, more news came out and this time the reports said that Wade had gotten another woman pregnant during the time that he and Union had taken a break from their relationship.
Wade already has two children from his marriage; two boys that he has been applauded for really stepping up and taking care of in spite of his marriage ending. Now, Union will inherit three step-sons (or two step-sons and a step-daughter) when she marries the love of her life.
Jada Pinkett Smith took to her Facebook page to give advice to her “friend” who remains un-named but her advice could very well be some advice that Gabrielle Union needs to hear, as well as other women who marry men who already have children.
Pinkett-Smith’s advice is below:
A letter to a friend: Blended families are NEVER easy, but here’s why I don’t have a lot of sympathy for your situation because… we CHOOSE them. When I married Will, I knew Trey was part of the package…Period! If I didn’t want that…I needed to marry someone else. Then I learned if I am going to love Trey…I had to learn to love the most important person in the world to him…his mother. And the two of us may not have always LIKED each other… but we have learned to LOVE each other. I can’t support any actions that keep a man from his children of a previous marriage. These are the situations that separate the women from the girls. Your behavior is that of an insecure child who needs to recognize her own weaknesses that MUST be strengthened to take on the task at hand. We can’t say we love our man and then come in between him and his children. THAT’S selfishness…NOT love. WOMAN UP… I’ve been there…I know. My blended family made me a giant… Taught me so much about love, commitment and it has been the biggest ego death to date. It’s time you let your blended family make you the giant you truly are. J
I think Pinkett-Smith’s advice is wise and “on point”. What do you think?
Nomalanga helps Black women thrive in their lives and careers. She is a Social Commentator, an Editor at Your Black World , a former College Professor and Mrs. Botswana. Visit Nomalanga’s Facebook page or Follow her on Twitter