Yesterday, when the news broke that Solange Knowles had allegedly attacked her sister Beyonce’s husband, Jay Z, my first reaction was not to believe it. Tabloids make up or exaggerate news stories all the time! I did however get to see the video footage of a woman who looked like Solange attacking a man who looked like Jay Z while a woman who looked like Beyonce stood by.
Looking through my Facebook timeline, I could see four main reasons that many speculate may have been behind the attack, assuming the man was in fact Jay Z and the woman was Solange:
1. Solange has seen Jay Z abuse her sister or cheat on her sister – If Solange witnessed her sister being subjected to verbal or physical abuse, maybe she just could not contain her rage and decided that she was going to attack her sister’s husband. Also, if Solange saw her sister’s husband carrying on inappropriately with another woman, this could have been enough to set her off.
2. Solange is sleeping with Jay Z – As hard as it is for me to believe this, many people were speculating that Solange may have been having “relations” with her brother in law. One person even commented “women never get worked up like this about a man unless they are sleeping with him”.
3. Solange was either drunk or on drugs – The curious part about saying that Solange was attacking Jay because she was drunk or on drugs is that it still begs the question of what exactly set her off. While she may have been inebriated, we still have to wonder what happened to make her so “fighting mad”.
4. Solange is mentally ill – Many reports say that Solange has struggled with mental illness, specifically bipolar disorder, in the past. Some have even further speculated that she was off her medication and was having an “episode”.
The video is below; see for yourself:[leadplayer_vid id=”5371F12CD0F5B”]
My take on the story:
First of all, no matter which one of those scenarios may be true, there is no justifiable reason for Solange to attack her sister’s husband, any man or any person. Violence is never the answer. Having said that though, it may be understandable if she was behaving that way because she did, in fact, feel that her sister was in some way being threatened. If, behind closed doors, Jay abuses his wife, many people would certainly react the way we saw Solange acting BUT it still does not make it right.
If Beyonce is in an unhealthy or dysfunctional relationship, that is her choice and her right. If she chooses to stay, so be it. Just so we are clear; I am not saying that Jay Z abuses his wife nor have I seen or heard anything that suggests that he does. What I am saying is that Beyonce is a grown woman and she is the only one who gets to decide what she will and will not tolerate in her relationship with her husband.
On the question of whether or not Beyonce should have intervened, (a lot of people seem to think that she should have), I believe that she should not have. Here is what I posted on a friend’s Fabebook wall, in response to a lot of people saying Beyonce should have gotten in the middle of the “craziness”:
I have a different take on this:
1. I did see her at some point appear to talk sense to her sister.
2. No, she did not have to get tangled in it. Sometimes it’s okay to let things play out and then address them after they calm down.
3. He is a man so I don’t think he needed a woman to defend him from an attack from another woman. How much harm could Solange have done…especially with a bodyguard holding her?
4. Choosing not to act is just as empowered a position as choosing to act.
5. Just so we’re clear; I am NOT a Beyonce fan or groupie or whatever they are called.
At the end of the day, we will never know exactly what happened and even if we do find out what caused Solange to behave the way she did, we can not be certain how much of it is true and how much has been “doctored” by a publicist.
Another thing to keep in mind is that Beyonce, Solange and Jay Z are human beings, just like the rest of us. They are going to have disagreements, fights and drama just like everyone else. Granted, I do not have personal experience with that level of “drama” but I still think that we may be making more out of it than it is because they happen to be celebrities.
One final note: I do commend Jay Z on how he handled the incident. He resisted hitting her back and that is a lot more than can be said for many men.
Nomalanga helps Black women thrive in their lives and careers. She is a Social Commentator, an Editor at Your Black World , a former College Professor and Mrs Botswana. Visit Nomalanga’s Facebook page or Follow her on Twitter