Relationships: Why Black Men Get Angry When Black Women Date White Men

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Tamera and hubbyBy Nomalanga Mhlauli-Moses

The media has certainly done a good job of planting it firmly in our minds that it is next to impossible for a Black woman to get her “happily ever after”. According to main stream media, Black men are to be feared, rather than loved and partnered with to make happy homes and raise children with.

While the media does tend to be overly focused on how Black women can’t “get a man” because there is either something wrong with Black men or Black women themselves, we can not deny that a lot of women do feel that sometimes it is hard to find a good, decent man among our brothers.

There is an increasing voice that suggests that maybe Black women should expand their dating pool and increase their likelihood of finding a man by exploring relationships with men of other races. As long as this “expansion” is not heavily influenced by the belief that there is something wrong or inferior about Black men, I reckon it could be a  good idea.

For those women that have explored relationships with men of other races, there is a lot of anger coming from Black men and here is why:

1. America has an ugly history when it comes to race – While some people would rather sweep it under the rug and try to pretend like it never happened or that Black people should be “over it” by now, this country has a very ugly past. Black people were oppressed by White people and there is no denying it. While I certainly don’t get angry at the thought of interracial dating and marriage, I have to admit that when I think about the country’s history, I can understand why it may be hurtful for a man to see his  “sister”  with what many still perceive as our oppressor.

2. Some Black people hate themselves – I’ll never forget the day when one of my students told me that she wanted to have a baby with either a “white guy” or a light skinned guy because she was dark skinned and could not bear the thought of having a baby that would be dark skinned like her. Of course not everyone who dates outside of the race does so because of self hatred, but there are people why do hate themselves and they date and marry outside of their own race because they want to disassociate themselves with their race and skin tone.

3. They are possessive jerks! – Let’s face it; there are some legitimate reasons to feel a little uneasy about seeing an interracial couple but there are also some people who are not uneasy for legitimate reasons -they are just possessive jerks who think they OWN women just because they belong to the same race. These men will often insult and call women names when they see them dating non-Black men. The funny thing is that many Black men don’t want to get married so you would think they would be indifferent if a woman married someone who wants to get married, regardless of their race.

At the end of the day, while I can certainly see both sides of the “coin”, I think that when it comes to matters of the heart, we would do well to just “live and let live”. There is no sense in having a bad day just because some random woman you saw was not living her life and conducting her love life according to how you have determined she should.

As for the women who want to expand their dating pool and keep an open mind about who they end up marrying, to you, I say: Do you!

Nomalanga helps Black women thrive in their lives and careers. She is a Social Commentator, an Editor at Your Black World , a former College Professor and the reigning Mrs Botswana. Visit Nomalanga’s Facebook page or Follow her on Twitter 

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109 Comments

  1. I'm surprised that there are black men upset at black women dating outside their race when all we mostly see is black men dating anything but a sista. I'm not mad at their decision to date who they desire, but don't be a hypocrite for me doing the exact same thing as you. I still can't believe there are any upset brothas regarding this issue.

  2. Oh yes, they lack the confidence to redefine their limits beyond what the White man says that they can have. See me in Heritage dress. yes, I even get stairs with that on or when I am with my son, which is about the color of all the people sanding beside me.

  3. Oh yes, they lack the confidence to redefine their limits beyond what the White man says that they can have. See me in Heritage dress. yes, I even get stairs with that on or when I am with my son, which is about the color of all the people sanding beside me.

  4. Tanya Melanie Reed on

    In this day and age, there are still people who have issues with the opposite *** dating outside their race. I could care less who a man dates, therefore he should feel the same about my choices.

  5. Chelle TheRegulator on

    May I say what a bunch of ignorant BULLSHIT this article is. All it does is feed the ignorant another meal of brainwashing. It also just serves to divide a people in another way. Please stop feeding stereotypical black on black hatred.

  6. Right, because it didn't say not a **** thing about how black men who feel this way will do/treat black women any kind of way, date a white woman, even leave us for a white or different raced woman, and yada yada yada….. Our country's racial past has a small percentage of why they may feel this way, **** look how black men have been towards white women all along

  7. Right, because it didn't say not a **** thing about how black men who feel this way will do/treat black women any kind of way, date a white woman, even leave us for a white or different raced woman, and yada yada yada….. Our country's racial past has a small percentage of why they may feel this way, **** look how black men have been towards white women all along

  8. Right, because it didn't say not a **** thing about how black men who feel this way will do/treat black women any kind of way, date a white woman, even leave us for a white or different raced woman, and yada yada yada….. Our country's racial past has a small percentage of why they may feel this way, **** look how black men have been towards white women all along

  9. Helena Hamilton on

    I live in Malibu, I never see a black man with a black woman. I only see black men with white women. It doesn't bother me. My man is white, and I never get any flack from anyone. Our children are mixed…I don't believe color should matter, and I stay clear of that kind of ignorance. Ignorant people are boring. If you are fortunate enough to spend your life with a like minded individual, you are blessed. The skin color of that like minded individual means nothing…

  10. Helena Hamilton on

    I live in Malibu, I never see a black man with a black woman. I only see black men with white women. It doesn't bother me. My man is white, and I never get any flack from anyone. Our children are mixed…I don't believe color should matter, and I stay clear of that kind of ignorance. Ignorant people are boring. If you are fortunate enough to spend your life with a like minded individual, you are blessed. The skin color of that like minded individual means nothing…

  11. Helena Hamilton on

    I live in Malibu, I never see a black man with a black woman. I only see black men with white women. It doesn't bother me. My man is white, and I never get any flack from anyone. Our children are mixed…I don't believe color should matter, and I stay clear of that kind of ignorance. Ignorant people are boring. If you are fortunate enough to spend your life with a like minded individual, you are blessed. The skin color of that like minded individual means nothing…

  12. Joshua Lewis on

    Personally as a young black man I get upset either way! whether it's a black man wit a white women or a black woman wit a white man! it'equally upsetting to me! I don't understand why our ppl would rather date outside our race when we should be trying to stick together and protect ourselves. it's sad to me that we think so poorly of our race that we would do whatever we can to not have our race anymore! SMH……

  13. Joshua Lewis on

    Personally as a young black man I get upset either way! whether it's a black man wit a white women or a black woman wit a white man! it'equally upsetting to me! I don't understand why our ppl would rather date outside our race when we should be trying to stick together and protect ourselves. it's sad to me that we think so poorly of our race that we would do whatever we can to not have our race anymore! SMH……

  14. Joshua Lewis on

    Personally as a young black man I get upset either way! whether it's a black man wit a white women or a black woman wit a white man! it'equally upsetting to me! I don't understand why our ppl would rather date outside our race when we should be trying to stick together and protect ourselves. it's sad to me that we think so poorly of our race that we would do whatever we can to not have our race anymore! SMH……

  15. Joshua Lewis on

    Personally as a young black man I get upset either way! whether it's a black man wit a white women or a black woman wit a white man! it'equally upsetting to me! I don't understand why our ppl would rather date outside our race when we should be trying to stick together and protect ourselves. it's sad to me that we think so poorly of our race that we would do whatever we can to not have our race anymore! SMH……

  16. Crystal Gillespie Because it is the truth and Mr Eliel Royster can't take it. I think this article just hit a nerve on him. If you ask black men if they agree with this article, they will say no and act exactly like in the article.

  17. Crystal Gillespie Because it is the truth and Mr Eliel Royster can't take it. I think this article just hit a nerve on him. If you ask black men if they agree with this article, they will say no and act exactly like in the article.

  18. Crystal Gillespie Because it is the truth and Mr Eliel Royster can't take it. I think this article just hit a nerve on him. If you ask black men if they agree with this article, they will say no and act exactly like in the article.

  19. Crystal Gillespie Because it is the truth and Mr Eliel Royster can't take it. I think this article just hit a nerve on him. If you ask black men if they agree with this article, they will say no and act exactly like in the article.

  20. Love is LOVE, and TRUE love his hard to find. If it's going in the same race, different race, same ***, or opposite *** go for it! It's hard to find someone that'll except you FLAWS and ALL. SO when you find it keep that person around and not think twice about what ANYONE has to say. Let God do the judging. I'm married to an Italian man and we have a child together. We get dirty looks from people most of the time but we don't care because we're in LOVE. Gosh it's 2013 people should get used to a change.

  21. I have pondered dating outside of my SO MUCH LOVED BROTHAS for quite some time as most of the brotha's that I have come across like to play games, aren't looking to settle down, don't want to have a future together, don't have their acts together, etc. etc. I am tired of waiting on a good brotha in all seriousness. When I say "Good brotha," I am not just talking about ANY GOOD BROTHA, we have to have chemistry, he has to be attractive to ME, we have to spark intellectually. It seems that all the good brotha's are TAKEN. With that said…. I have a life that I would love to share with someone and even though I have been so against dating outside of my race, my patience is running thin and my acceptance is starting to look a little better towards love being a man of any race. I am still holding on….but I won't put up much of a fight anymore. I'm tired.

  22. The longer we live the more we discover that we are not rational beings, and history has detailed our contradictions, hypocrisies, and conundrums. Neither gender, race, culture should claim innocence or absolution from being swayed by what, at the time and since, was in their best interests.

  23. Jerry Robertson on

    As a black man with black friends? This is so dumb because nobody give a **** about who marry who…Can't this newspaper find something better about LIFE then this BULLSHIT…..

  24. I like the way you think and express yourself, color should never be a problem in a relationship, just having someone to love you for who you are that what i'm looking for in a man.

  25. Tony L Bullock on

    There is nothing more possessive than a white man, who will kill and destroy if you can't have his way… Sisters want to be with them, that's their business, but when he starts to beat you, cheat on you, and boss you just like they do white women, I'm quite sure they will find a way to deal with it.

  26. Jahings Dada on

    That's a myth. Most African American men date black women. There are those who don't of course. But those are the ones who couldn't be bothered who black women date because they think less of black women, anyway. And that is the issue at play here, the self hatred and stereo-typing to the extent that people reject people of their own race.

  27. Jahings Dada on

    Latonya Mccain , what makes you think men of other races are any different? I'm really asking you. Did you read a peer reviewed report that showed beyond reasonable doubt that African American men are so markedly different from other men. Look, if you wanna date outside your race then just do it, but don't try to justify it with some false stereotypes.

  28. Jahings Dada on

    I think you the one who's ignorant. You must avoid taking your own little life and generalizing it to imagine that what you do applies to everybody. There are lots of black-black couples in Malibu. Only thing is because you are so caught up in your interracial relationship, that's what your mind sees when you are out there.

  29. Loraine Marr you got to do what makes you happy but remember grass is not always greener on the other side. There are certain brothers that don't have the act together, play games and just want hit and don't want to commit. There are certain females that are like that also.

  30. Aisha T. Bigbee on

    I don't know who these black men are that are upset… But they need to step back. Its hard to find a good man in America no matter what color they are. It is scientifically factual diversification in the gene pool makes the genome stronger. Go forth people and diversify…

  31. Gerson Wehl A on

    I don, t care if black people date outside their race, my probleem is when start talking nonsense about their own race, why can a white man or woman date ten white women or men before finding the right one.I think sometimes that you we, re walking with that idea of dating out side your race, i have never heard a white man or woman say why they don, t date their own race, but always black folks must open their big mouth.Now I see a lot of rich white men date sisters but they date sister who have millions , he will never married a poor black woman.On the other hand if a black is rich he marries a poor white woman.

  32. Jahings Dada Correction, most black men screw black women (in more ways than one.) As for real dating and marriage, no the "myth" is true. Black men are selfish and dont treat black women as they should be treated.

  33. Loraine Marr How do you love those who have not shown the same love to you? I dont understand that about my sistas, yall say yall love black men but I never hear black men say the same. So who are you loving?

  34. Jahings Dada We assume these things based on what we see, it's not a myth when it actually happens. I live in Central Texas, and what I see is Black men with non-Black women. Thankfully, more Black women are wising up, realizing we have options too, and are mostly with non-Black men as a result (at least that's the case in my area).

  35. To be honest, I'm safer with my White man. Black men are truly a danger to Black women (and children), as evidenced by all the crime, rapings, killings, abuse, etc. White and non-Black men aren't doing the bulk of that to us. They're also not the ones impregnating and dumping Black women en masse, they're marrying us and helping us build healthy relationships. You should never be upset when a Black woman has a functional relationship, no matter if she's with a White man or not. Black women need protecting, Black men are supposed to be MEN; protect yourselves. And as long as Black men continue to create children at the rate they do, trust, the "Black race" isn't going anywhere. Black women don't have to sacrifice ourselves and our well-being to "save" it.

  36. Rhonda Marie on

    White and non-Black men aren't the main ones killing us, killing our kids, using, abusing, raping, beating, sperming and dumping, denigrating us at every turn, abandoning & rejecting us…that's on you, Black men. Sounds like you're projecting the typical actions of Black men onto White men, but here's the thing: we're not stupid. We only have to look around to see who's doing to real damage to Black women.

  37. Rhonda Marie on

    I thought you all were angry because we're more educated and therefore "think we're better". I've also heard Black men are mad because we don't look good enough, aren't as permissive as white women, aren't as sexually liberated as white women, yet much too whorish for anyone to respect, too loud, too fat, too independent, yet gold diggers who aren't independent enough, have too many kids, yet have aborted half the Black race…seems no matter what, Black men will find something to blame on Black women. I say more of us should just wash our hands of the mess and keep dating out.

  38. Sylvia Carney on

    I didn't think black men cared, since they date anyone else but a black woman. Who cares what they think anymore.

  39. Sylvia Carney on

    I didn't think black men cared, since they date anyone else but a black woman. Who cares what they think anymore.

  40. Zaia Newms, your self hate is apparent. If you want to date outside your race go ahead. But stop with the excuses, men are bad and good in all races.

  41. Rhonda, you sound like an idiot. Who do you think are doing those same things to white women? That would be the white men sweetie that you put on a pedestal and desire to date. See how stupid you sound!

  42. For the women who think the grass is greener on the other side and don't understand there are good and bad men in every race. Then maybe you should know the facts before you seek someone outside your race due to personal issues and excuses than love.

    The Center for Disease Control statistics showed that forty-one percent of interracial marriage ended in divorce compared to 31 percent for same-race marriages. Interracial marriages were more likely to end in divorce than same-ethnic marriages due to interracial couples having to work through different cultural assumptions and expectations that are so integrated into their lives that they're not consciously aware of before deciding to get married. In addition, regardless to race 49 percent of ALL marriages end up in divorces within 8 years.

    Therefore black men are no different than the other men, so stop with the nonsense!

  43. I don’t care who dates whom. I’m a Black man and I love my sisters. I have never dated outside of my race because I never had any desire to. I have 3 daughters and I’d rather them hook up with a man of another race that treats them right, than a Black man that doesn’t.

      • You should see the comment again, she didnt say that, just that race wasnt important pretty much.

        • Rummy u a ma ******* fool fa that. You spit sum real knowledge I mean somethings we are to blame but us being branded a threat u right. I dun see why the majority of people wanna attack you fa your opinions. I think alot of what I said must of hit home…. but it is what it is yo from on black brother to another keep doing ya thing man. Dont let these closed minded people try to muzzle ya opinions.

      • You should see the comment again, he didnt say that, just that race wasnt important pretty much.

      • Personally, black men cannot have it both ways; they can date, sleep, and marry white but have a problem with sisters eho choose to date white men. I waited for years to get asked out by brothers; and yes I admit my father was very strict in the past, but that should jot have stopped me from getting asked out. I graduated high school early and moved out at 15, and started college early. I got yired of sitting home waiting to be asked out by certain men and started dating whomever asked me out. Today while I have gone out a little more, my preferences like all men. I just am asked by one particular type of man. I ended falling in love and getting married eventually, but to those who have the audavity to let daughters, sisters, mothers, or friends be fesrful of dating men outside of their race…you sound afraid that these women will find “men” who love and wsnt to care for them! What happened in the past happened; but I am not going to hold that over the heads of White men today who wete not there, maybe not even born yet, and don’t have those same beliefs of those men back then! You can’t penalize men who are white just because they are white?

    • Chocolate wonder on

      You a Gotdamn lie! There isn’t a Black Man alive that would ever say some BS like that. You’re either a Misguided Sista or a white boy!

    • I could have sworn you said man of another race not just a white man. Another ignorant comment is another reason why we as black women are stereotyped as loud and ignorant. Thank you for being a man secure enough with himself to only want what makes his children happy, and not become angry over other people’s decisions and choices.

  44. I have no problem as I have gotten older looking to date
    Outside my race , now let me make myself clear I have dated nothing but black men as as I’m a black woman, my outlook has changed my way of thinking
    and what I desire from a man has surly changed .. Jus sayin…..

  45. Chocolate wonder on

    I’m a Black Man and I love my Black Women with all my heart. When YOU(Nomalanga) say the media has planted it firmly in our minds that it is next to impossible for a Black woman to get her “happily ever after”on you are right. It is YOU that encourages this Mental Disease. The Majority of Black Men and do Women date and marry. When you refer to dating outside your race just go ahead and say date white men. You BARELY see a Sista with an Asian, Mexican,or Indian man, It’s primarily white. The white man and white woman are Not God’s Gift to Blacks. They are not to be Idolized. They are not the Chosen One’s as they would like for every race to believe. They don’t look at YOU as the Chosen One’s or Idolize YOU that’s for **** sure. As a matter of fact the majority hates the very ground you walk on and that’s a fact. Look to your own just like they look to their own and don’t believe the BS that the “Media” is putting out there. If you believe EVERYTHING they say, then we’re an Endangered Species.

  46. the media always glorified the black man
    Being with the white woman. You see it often. It’s rare to
    See the black woman with the white man until recently.
    The only color of love ….IS RED HOT!

  47. Rosemary Myers on

    Okay now hear this loud and clear and give me proper advice – you with the know how about black and white.

    I have never dated a white man in my life – do you think I should try and see or if not why do you think not

  48. Mercedes Daniel on

    I could NEVER see myself with a white man or any man besides a Black King. Everyone including the media try to talk down upon our race especially our men. If our men were that bad and not wanting to marry us then why do you see A lot of White women stepping out their race to be with our a black man. That’s because even they see the greatness in our men. #LoveMyBlackKings!!!

    • Exactly, which why a lot of black women prefer not to limit themselves for something that doesn’t exsist: the black “kang”. Black men are men, as white and Hispanic. You have a right to your attractions, just let other black women have theirs. If you prefer to limit yourself fine, no one is going to bash you. But denying critisim and raising a man to a level above your own is like you serving yourself up as slab or desperate. But maybe we just see men differently.

      I adore black men also as a black woman. But as friends, family, and colleagues. But not romantically, husbands or mates. I have a ton of black men in my life whom I love and adore. I’m just not attracted to them in way I’d share my womb with one. There is no animosity towards them. Its just that I savor certain personality types and core values that most black men don’t share with me. Thus there is no attraction. It has nothing to do with looks and the geographical features we share. Its based off of conditioning, enviorment, and observation.

      Growing up all the things my family would watch: BET, VH1, MTV, etc and the way a lot black men treated women and relationships both in real life and media turned me off sometime early in my childhood, along with being disgusted with the behavior of the black community as a whole. With that I always felt the need to put on a performance for black men and women to be accepted. But I guess its human nature to be attracted to someone who treats you well. And growing up Hispanics, Asians, and Whites treated me better and was much more accepting of me. And not blurt out ignorant comments due to feeling insecure about themselves such as “You talk white”(which doesn’t exist also).

  49. I actually went through this situation not too long ago. The brother I was talking to at the time stated proudly that he attracted mostly “red bones” (I’m brown skin). I said “And I attract men of other races.What’s your point?” He was visibly irritated. I absolutely hate the entitlement brothers feel towards ALL women,as if they’re some great prize. I have been receiving more more attention from other races (and less from brothers) and plan on taking full advantage of interracial opportunities.

  50. i find yall being very racist, most blacks are “more” racist than whites, i mean love is about individuality nothing like this stupidity ’bout race, like wth!!!!! and blaming the media, why do yall blacks blame everything on the media?!?!?!?!?!? i don’t get it, i just don’t, anyway, all i’m saying is love is love, the issue of colour is something you bring along probably just for the sake

  51. I see this question is being asked more and more. Of all the black men who really feel this way,there is never one who steps up to answer the question. It’s always black women commenting, or black men who claim not to feel this way. It’s obvious that there are many black men out there who date interracially & do have a problem when Black women do it. I’ve tried to ask men like this what is the reason, but never get an actual response. Why is it that black men are avoiding this question? Do they not want to say the truth, which is they feel entitled to us, but don’t feel the need to be loyal in return. Do they think of black Women as less than them? Do they not want us to be on the same “level” as them with their white counterparts? These men come off as selfish, self hating, and just plain hateful of black women if you ask me.

  52. I say love is color-blind and I do not judge. To each his/her own. I must say as I have gotten older, finding a black man to date who doesn’t have several baby’s mothers, a decent job/education, financially stable has become a darn near impossible feat. Not saying they’re not out there but the older you get, those ones are taken. With that being said, I have NO problem dating any race. It’s 2013, after all, not 1913. LOL!

  53. I know this post is late but I just happened acrossed it. I dont want to come off as racist but im highly against my sisters dating white. I really get annoyed when the sins of one condemn the whole. What I mean is when a sista cant find a good black man they turn to the white man. I never dated white dated sistas, ricans, dominicans & etc so basicaly women of color with different racial backgrounds. But as social media shows negative side of the black man more than the positive. I have three children I love them and their mother( a sista) to death. I covet my black goddess that I do it turns my stomach to see a white man with a black woman. For people who says that black men treat their goddesses like **** are only talking about a certain percentage. The same can be said for a white man I just feel like its unnatural basically wrong you can say I still see the world through the oppressed eyes of my ancestors. White men getting dirty looks from us brothers will never understand how we feel I wouldnt approve of my daughter dating a white man same with my son I wouldnt want him dating a white women. Food for thought the devil wears white dont get offended by it its the truth. Years of oppression and hate are still here to me a white man wit a black woman is like a white person feeling entitle to say ***** because they were raised around black people. Basically I feel white america is trying to breed out the black man by taking the black women. Brothers we really need to step up to bat stop with this bullshit thats been going on for so many years pushing the sistas into the arms of the white devils. I come from a happily married household and me and my childrens mother are planning that happy ever after ending as well as a black family. But enough of my rant call what u want but its what I feel.

    • Not offended. There are plenty of good black men out there. I’m attracted to all races not just black and white. I’m just coincidently dating a white man. I’m just not going to limit myself to one type of man. I don’t care when I see a black man with any other race so essentially why should I care what you all think of me and who I date. I’m a live and let live type of person.

      Not trying to be rude in the least but I’d anyone is breeding out its white women with black men especially since those relationships are more predominate. I’m not what would be considered ‘a white black women’ nor do I look like one. I’m definitely not some ghetto hood rat. I was raised by both of my black parents who were married for 40 years and raised me judge the sin not the sinner.

      I respect your words and your right to speak then. I only wanted to inform you that I was not pushed away from my’brothas’ I walked freely and happily away to explore.

      • Umm my issue is white men dating black women. would I care is any of my kids date hispanic asian native Americans or middle eastern men or women? No of course not as I said before I rather my children date people of color. Now if my kids brought home a white man or woman yes I would be highly upset but I would b have to bite the bullet to keep my children happy. My kids know how i feel bout black people dating white people, and as far as black men with white women they are too weak for a black women. They see their resistance to bend and break to their will so they go with the weaker vessel which is a white women. My brothers baby mom said our mother raised a hate monger for my beliefs …..lol. I just stick to my convictions I raised my children how my parents raised me “in the ghetto” as king which is our birthright so I raise my kids like that too. Which means I created a new generation of arrogant ******** lol j/k. As far as you saying u werent pushed let me rephrase it better a percentage of black women with white men prefer the white men because its a security blanket not too much pressure. They get sick of black mans bullshit true, some professional black women as I said find financially secured with a white man. The white man is a weak vessel than the black woman the attitude of a black women is the most powerful thing I ever seen in a women. They dont back down they wont run the black women is the matriarch of the family structure that has been torn a sunder not by only the black man but the white man period. Again I see it through my oppressed ebony eyes this isnt why do black men get angry over a mexican rican asian or etc wit a black women its why do black men get angry over white men with black women. Basically its the trail of tears all over again when the whie savages came over and took the indians land and killed off a majority of the indians that refused to leave. I’ll show you where im coming from everybody saw Roots and saw how the white man took and broke up the tribes tore families apart raped our ancestors mutilated them and eventually killed them. To me Roots is pg compared Mandingo I believe it is where they took the black men beat the beheaded then and casturated them to keep the population down on the plantations havent seen it in a while but imma end saying its unnatural unholy immoral disgusting and all together **** the white man wit a black woman period.

        • Be that as it may. You still don’t get it though. I’m not with him for any other reason than he attracted me and our personalities go well together. Not because you think he’s weak and I’m strong. We just click it’s really that simple. But hey your entitled to your thoughts just like I’m entitled to mine. I’m not African I was not born in Africa so I won’t use that excuse to harbor hate. My ancestors had that right. I do have the right to fight for what I want and fight to keep my choices.

          I hold no grudge in my heart for no person, and the only judgement that’s matters is God’s period. Love you deuces.

          • And u dont get it Im not ya dad do u dont have to share ya feelings about ya so called man. Im not using the fact that our ancestors were oppressed as an excuse. Again “through my oppressed ebony eyes” and what the **** does being born in africa have to do with what the **** I just said? You actin like I’m trynna brainwash u into thinking one way. You nick pick at certain aspects of my comments instead of looking at it as a whole. I don’t care bout if ya personas click is just what black men and women feel about seeing there brothas n sistasnwit the devil. Let me break it down to be real ******* clear and you can comprehend my feelings toward the white race as a whole. I date any other race but white there shifty n sneaky they stab a knife in ya back soon as you turn ya ******* back on them. The reason why the status of the united States and majority of the world is ****** up is because of a white man. Thats just fa starters this **** is way deeper than oh I feel like she shouldnt date that white ma *****. Its on a whole nother level that you aint ready to or refuse to accept it. It will always be descriminated against like openly gay marriages so if you really want to comment on one of my post please read the full post before you decide to post and jot just nick pick. Trust im younga than alot of people think but I do know my **** and your rebuttals to my comments shows that you fall a lil short of the bar to even understand where im coming from. But I digress everybody has the free will to do what they want. As for the earlier part of my post reguarding africa you dont have to be african to understand that we are enemy. Again thee most endangered species on the face of the earth is the black men 50 percent of black men will go to jail for some petty bullshit then come home try to get a job can’t get a good then have to settle with making less than what they should get when they get a alright job. Then they have to put up with scrutiny from the bosses who is looking for a reason to fire someone. They get fired now they are getting a lil bit of bit unemployment not enough to feed a house hold. Now we’re in a new recession with a ever shrinking job pool then you have to compete with a white most of the time for a job. We know pete and jo are drinking buddies so you know your not gonna get that job so now your left wit fast food restaurants which pay minimum wage ****** health I dont think they get 401k plans unless your management. So all there is left to do is hustle which is very lucrative if you dont get caught. If you get caught they want you to make a deal if you dont deal they will try to slap you with the rico act because you may be part of the drug cartel then its back to prison. Then tax payers dollars go into building new prisons ie new plantations which is why we call it modern day slavery. Alot of black men put themselves into but **** alot of black men are wrongfully accused of crimes they never committed so they get locked up for half their lives leaving the children most of the time fatherless which leads to looking to the streets for a male guidance which then initiates a new cycle which what we call the ultimate genocide of the black man. This isnt from books or research all peronal experience that no white man can relate to thank you and good night.

          • I really dont mean to come off as an ******* jerk ***** or ********. Im just a real ma ***** that spits **** people dont want to hear or say

          • you haven’t said a word that I haven’t wanted to hear. I never disagreed with everything else that you said with the exception of the points that I felt where aimed at women and I see where your coming. from. As I stated earlier you have a right to say anything you want.

            These are words and well to be honest and I’m not saying this in a mean way but I just don’t care enough to get mad or offended about this particular topic. Life is about opinions and it is what it is. So it’s ok.

  54. Im not trynna make anyone mad. If it was vice versa I’ll still say the same thing ya digg I feel like sugar coating wont make it taste sweeter knamean

    • You are coming off as an angry and bitter black man! You made yourself look foolish and that is why more black women are dating outside their race.

  55. The racism and ignorance I have just read is beyond belief, especially from this buffoon Rummy. I was in an interracial relationship and was on the receiving end of hate by so called “people of color”. The reason for the hate is very simply an inferiority complex on the part of the hater. Those comfortable with themselves feel no anger. Thug culture and buying into it is part of what brings the black man down. One third of black men will end up in prison compared to about one in twenty whites and I don’t want to hear the excuse that it is because of racist law enforcement. With stats like that there is no wonder law enforcement is racist to blacks. You don’t hear about police being racist to Asians. Go figure. Rummy obviously feels inferior because of his fellow black man, even if he is an upstanding although racist citizen. Black men are to be pitied, not feared. If black women find white men to be a better prospect its pretty much the fault of the black man himself.

    • Lmao I’m a buffoon for spitting knowledge. Neal why are you even saying my name. White people are a disease to this earth period errything I said the white man did rape burn and pilage other races they think is inferior to them. And you wanna talk statistics why cant I drive my bmw down the street wit tints and a loud system. The justice system is aimed at the black man you stupid little ****. There are more reported police assaults on african American man than any other race. Why because we intimidate the white since day one. Our natural strength n our intimidating ebony eyes. If you think im a buffoon for spitting knowledge then you sir are an idiot. This is more than white man n black women this is the curse one the earth known as the white man so **** you and good night **** Murray

    • You hit it right on the nail. Finally someone who has enough ***** to say it like it is. I’m a mix woman who dates only white men. I date white men simply because they don’t have all the hang ups black men have. Sick of it, so I moved on, and yes ladies, the grass is greener on the other side.

  56. I agree @Neal Murray. People who get mad at interracial dating have complexes.If you’re happy with yours,you shouldn’t be offended by what anyone else is choosing to do. So give me a break. Ya’ll know ya’ll go gaga for non black women so quit acting hurt. Black men aren’t capable of taking responsibility for their actions. Someone else is always to blame. Sigh I stop listening when black men speak.

    • Don I dont go gaga over other women but black. Blame people for what how society has branded us. I swear on my kids half yall old enough to be my parents but still dont understand the true history of white america and black America im done trynna paint on a laminated canvas. Knowledge is knowledge and I blame no one for my faults but when I get pulled over in my neighborhood because I look suspicious then I start blaming the whiteys for how they shaped the world to look at the black man . Smh

  57. I love women of all colors and they love me. It’s not my fault I was born with blonde hair and blue eyes. I totally believe you’re a young man “Rummy”. Your ignorance is unfathonably deep and you sound very juvenile. White Devil? Give me a break. Your descendants will be light skinned. “Black” isn’t an endangered species. We’re all human. Black and white are only colors. One day, when we finally desegregate ourselves, we won’t be able to tell where one race ends and the next one begins. Truth. I pray you, Rummy, will find peace in this lifetime. Reply with what you want, but I won’t be back to read it. Peace!

  58. Rummy the justice system is aimed at criminals. It just so happens a disproportionate amount of criminals are black and therefore it follows there will be more police brutality aimed at blacks but I doubt you are smart enough to get that. You would rather believe the preposterous notion that white cops are framing hundreds of thousands of innocent blacks for crimes they didn’t commit. Give me a break. That’s what you are saying isn’t it. All those huge number of blacks in prison are innocent. Please.We are not morons. You are a pathetic racist who will accomplish nothing in life because all you aree interested in doing is blaming others for your own failings. Black men need to man up and accept responsibility instead of accepting handouts. And here is a tip, try playing your music at a level acceptable to others, don’t dress like a loser, don’t wear your pants around your ankles, smile and act friendly and you will be amazed because people will act the same to you. If you persist in crying about the “white devil” you will be left behind on handouts and I’ll be laughing at you as I’m hooking up with Sistas of quality, having kids and teaching them the difference between being black and being a *****.

  59. Wow you still responding to me son son im blessed its called ones own perception of the world then they manifest it into a opinion thatthey can share. But you wanna get tough on blogs Imma say this to you one time n one time only Neal I am very successful i own my own businesses and raise my children wit true knowledge. And disrespect me on lumping me with ****** that lay on there back n accept hand outs imma say it like this n leave this **** alone I lived a hustlas life and a thugs life without the cosmic karamic pay back. And imma put this on my kids if I knew where ya ***** *** lived I would have hands put on u period. Let reiterate that im not net thug gang banger none of those just a real a ******* ***** that came from the grimy bottom now sittin pretty but I do have resources so watch the disrespectful tone *****

  60. Rummy you worthless buffoon, did I read you right? You blame whitey for how they shaped the world to look at the back man. Your fellow black shaped the world that way for you. Young black men are 14 times more likely to commit murder than young white men. Black men made themselves suspicious with statistics like that. But no, in your eyes blacks can do no wrong. Obviously whitey is manipulating the world to be suspicious of young black men. When you blame others all the time you fail to look at yourselves. You will always be at the bottom because you love the status of being the victim. You always have the perfect excuse to not improve yourselves. Its too easy to pull the slavery card. Well I have news for you. You weren’t a slave, neither were your parents’ grandparents or great grand parents. It was mostly whites that died to put an end to slavery. And most of our families didn’t even own slaves. My family was in Ireland being persecuted by the English but do I blame my problems today on the English. No. But you don’t know what its like I hear you say. The cry of the loser. At this point I have very little else to say to you, because you sir are a **** Head.

    • Awww you gonna get the lynch mob on me you and billy bob fixing to emmit till me huh? Wow u called boy tsk tsk tsk you really must want to call me a ****** instead of boy or buffoon. Lmao u gonna burn a cross in my yard right smh. bruh stop with ya tough net bloggin then still try to sound tough when u gonna rat go on rat what I get a citation and light probation then I’ll find out where u be and beat the brakes off you for being a ***** that’s one scenerio the second one is you shut the **** up n go on bout ya life. The third is the same as the first but more brutal so pick ya poison

    • Neil, trust me, you are wasting your time and energy responding to this man. Black men will NEVER take responsibility for their own actions. They are stuck in a time that doesn’t exist anymore and will always blame everyone else for their actions because of something that is history. If they choose to hold on to the anger it’s their problem. I gave up on them because they gave up on themselves and on their own people. If it’s not the white man’s fault it’s the black woman ‘s fault. But NEVER, EVER their fault. So give up it’s not going to change.

  61. Im a white male who has been happily married to a black female for 15 great years. My woman is the best wife any man could ever imagine. We have 3 awesome sons who are happy and make great grades in school. We have everything anyone could ever want outta life. I have provided for my wife and kids and tell them that I love them like everyday is the last day.Black men, I never opressed your race or anyone elses for that matter. Step up to the bat, you’re the ones with the double standards..it’s ok to date a white woman but not have a white man date your daughters. Pleeeease! My wife and I agree, it’s time to move on.Stop punishing people with your hatred from the past. And most of all, black women dont belong to you like property. As for me, Ill always love my African Queen.

  62. Wow yall still talking lmao. As I said in my previous post your words hold no relevance to me ****. Ostracized someone for their opinions lmao. Neal u keep says saying buffoon u wanna call me a ****** huh buddy. Smh your money isnt long enough to let ya words affect me at the end of the day it is what it is. Im the bad guy real talk even though I spit knowledge I relish in the fact a white man fears me. Sold drugs yup, commited crimes I will never be prosecuted for yup, and do I give a **** about what weak willed black women and white crackers think????? Nope….. I do me spend yearly salary bullshitting around on vacations. The fact is this **** is hilarious

  63. I just came across this site today and read all of the comments. Personally, I believe everyone should be free to date and/or marry regardless to race or gender.

    I was surprise at the attacks on Rummy. Here you have a black man willing to be very honest and open with his opinion. Whether you agreed or disagreed with him it doesn’t make his views invalid. He didn’t come across as person that would walk the streets in protest or would hurt a interracial couple. There are many people who oppose interracial dating and that’s okay. Speaking as a Black American woman, some of Rummy points are very valid and I respect him for being honest in sharing.

    I noticed from reading a lot online that some White men are quick to say that Black men refuse to take ownership for their own actions and in some cases I agree, but the same can be said for some White men. White men have created a judicial system, laws, and a governing body that’s design with White privilege in mind. Some of Rummy’s claims can easily be researched and proven or simply by watching the news. Yet, Rummy is dismissed as a worthless buffoon. Maybe he would be more open minded if society was fair and balanced.

    Also, it’s hard to believe that a Black woman would be in a relationship with a white man and that man denies the existence of unfair laws and treatment of Black people, especially Black men in America.

    • Ok I went off on my last post. Thank you kat for atleast reading and ubderstanding some valid points I tried to kake out. But sometimes people do not want to accept the truth. Its funny how when someone doesn’t condone the actions of black women wit white men or vice gersa u are branded a racist. Its ashame that only one african american queen in this community sees where im coming from. **** its like I done ****** in yall rice crispys cause I don like a wm with a bw. Real talk n imma keep it 100 a black woman bringing a white man home will not be fully accepted but let a white woman bring a black man home……. that man would get more death than obama. Depends on what part of the country u in. But half these people act like imma attack u for being wit a black woman… smh kat I stopped trying to educate people on the judicial system. Real talk white people made coke, crack, meth, lsd, angel dust war on drugs line the politicians pockets. Every big drug bust made in the history of the us was corrupted. In of every drug bust they take a certain amount of days ugs as evidence then it suppose to be destroyed. They give the product to a new connect they then take cuts from the dealers. When a new election or promotion comes up they mysteriously take down the smaller organisations so if they dont have a lawyer they get a state appointed lawyer public defenders. Then after that case the pds pass on info to their cohorts cause again money makes the world go round. But the funniest this is they dont distribute this **** in their suburban gated communities. They distribute it through out the inter city neighborhoods knowing they can round up the sheeple. Basically white people got the world **** up im done educating people thank you Kat for seeing my perspectives

  64. Rummy, it’s new for me to comment online. I normally just read and keep it moving, but I felt compel to speak since a lot of what you said is true. For some people “ignorance is bliss” because it allow a person to escape the drama of the real world. I agree that there’s so much corruptions and greed in politicians, law enforcement agencies, corporations, and the wealthy. However, not all white people are the same. There were White people that aided Black people during slavery and stood with us during the civil rights movements. Today many White people are standing and fighting with us for equality for all. So I try not to group all people in the same category.

    Also, I understand why some Black women would be against your views on BW/WM relationships. Although your wife is Black, a small percentage of Black men (and growing) have been dating White women for years. So how is it fair that Black women should limit themselves to minority men only? Black women also deserve to be loved, cherished, respected by whoever is willing to love, provide, and protect them.

    As for drugs being distributed in our communities, we have to take some responsibility, especially Black men. I feel that we have a choice, but to often we take the easy route regardless to the end results. Quick money is more important than protecting our communities (of course, there are other factors). I moved out of the Black community because I was fed up with many of the slave mentalities. We do have a choice in our actions influencing our communities. I remember getting extremely upset seeing Black men driving very nice cars, with inflated egos, dressed extremely well with large sums of money in their pockets, but they were cancer. These men were cancer because they sold drugs destroying their own people and communities. So, just because the distributor maybe White doesn’t mean we have to take part in it. Sadly, some of these same selfish people are not willing to give back to the communities they helped to destroy.

    • See I feel you kat I aint going to lie I was one of those men that destroyed my community. Keyword was and for black men chasing white women I feel the same as most black women. Some feel that a black women isnt good enough for them and I just feel that they cant handle a black women. Other times some black women are broken and push black men away but to hold a white woman over a black woman…. im like ***** ya mom is black. As for easy way out yeah we got choices but sometimes the bad choice is the only choice. Not everyone gonna get drafted or signed. I did what I had to do for my family. And for loving a black women brothers need to understand a black woman loves so hard. Im happy I have one of those broken hateful black women that loves me. All she needed was love and affection trust if I was allowed to I would love each and every black women with my whole soul and being and im not talking bout sexually.

      • I’m smiling, your wife is a lucky woman. I wish the number of BM on YouTube bashing BW had your awareness.

        It’s been very enjoyable speaking with you and I wish you all the best.

  65. Hey Rummy, you just a pretender! Talk a big game but ain’t **** I put my girls baby daddy in his place. You gonna learn one day that color doesn’t mean **** in a fight. I treat my woman like queen. No one disrespect her not even her punk **** baby daddy. I Fear no man you could be purple and I still step to you and put you in your place. Go ahead and think your skin color makes you bad *** you ignorant pretender!

  66. Hey Rummy, you just a pretender! Talk a big game but ain’t **** I put my girls baby daddy in his place. You gonna learn one day that color doesn’t mean **** in a fight. I treat my woman like queen. No one disrespect her not even her punk **** baby daddy. I Fear no man you could be purple and I still step to you and put you in your place. Go ahead and think your skin color makes you bad *** you ignorant pretender!

  67. Alexander Hines on

    Lol, this thread is hilarious. Ok I will say there is a small portion of bitchy black men who do get upset when a black woman dates or marries a white man, but the majority of us DO NOT CARE who your with and that’s real, i’m talking like 92% out of 100 black men that do not care. Stop lying to yourselves and trying to say we do, why would we care when us black men are so well known to date interracial? But my real reason for bothering to post is because I take up issue with the self hating idiots that choose to date stereotypical n words rather than actual black men but dismiss real black men as useless when the n words do them wrong, that’s what they do, there ****** stupid. (that is if you self hating tricks would even consider dating a black person), and now you think all black men are the same lol how pathetic of you. Seriously, your all so weak minded that you have adapted the mindset and/or mentality of the very people that have sworn to hate you for reasons as simple as skin color, these people I speak of are the KKK and Skin-Heads. I am not saying all black women who date interracial are self hating, my older sister had a white boyfriend for awhile and I myself have dated black, white, Hispanic and Asian women before, my current girlfriend is black. (and I have never abused a woman in my life so you self hating ******* can get that out of your head right now). but I can’t help but notice that most of the women that date white men or outside of our race in general are self hating, and its funny but at the same rate saddening how weak minded you all are. And my reasons for even being on this website is because I am majoring in ethics and psychology and this whole race and love thing is apart of a project i’m doing. Race AND LOVE ARE NOT THE SAME THINGS AND IT IS NEXT TO IMPOSSIBLE TO HAVE A RACIAL PREFERENCE WITHOUT ACTUALLY BEING A RACIST. AND SEEING AS THIS WEBSITE IS DIRECTED TOWARDS BLACK WOMEN, HATING BLACK MEN MEANS YOU ARE A SELF HATING BACKWARDS *** WENCH. (Understand that fact first, if you feel you must reply to me, I really haven’t the time nor the patience for ignorance).

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