By: Krystle Crossman
There are some relationships where people feel like they are being manipulated by the other partner and they are probably right. They don’t know all of the warning signs or they are not willing to leave and so they continue to be emotionally manipulated by the other party. Here are some warning signs of manipulation and what to do about them:
1. You know for a fact that you heard your partner tell you that you could buy a new appliance for the house and so you did. But then they start lying and saying that they never told you that. They will become so convincing that you will be doubting your hearing skills. They are so good at lying by this point you will have no idea what is true and what isn’t anymore. Any time that you feel that you are about to have an important conversation with your partner bring along a notebook or a tape recorder. Once they start lying you will have proof that they did in fact say what they are claiming not to have said.
2. Someone who is emotionally manipulative will never take responsibility for their actions. They will always place the blame on someone else. They become the victim in every situation and will drag you along for the pity party. Don’t give in to it.
3. Anything you can do I can do better. That is one of the manipulator’s favorite phrases. No matter what you are going through they will always have something that is ten times worse. If you have a large cut somewhere they will have supposedly lost a finger but had it reattached. If you have a headache they have an even bigger one, the worst one that they have ever experienced. The best thing to do is to walk away once they start saying that you are selfish because they have gone through more than you and you never acknowledged it.
4. If they forget your birthday or a special anniversary don’t bother calling them out on it. They will turn the situation around to make you feel guilty when you didn’t even do anything. They will tell you that of course they remembered but they had a lot of other stuff going on and they hadn’t had time to acknowledge that which they have forgotten. Then they make you feel guilty for trying to make them feel guilty. Don’t feed in to it and don’t begin to take care of them when they bring out the sob story.
5. A manipulator will fight dirty. They will talk about you behind your back. They will say all of the things that they know will hurt you the most. They will place all blame on you. Many times they will be passive aggressive. Just walk away because you will end up feeling like you have done something wrong if you give in to them.