This Mother Is Grateful For Not Having a Black Son

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downloadBy: Krystle Crossman

When Krishann Briscoe became pregnant at the age of 19 she was terrified. Once she became used to the idea of being a single mother she would dream about the baby that she would have. She hoped that the baby was going to be a boy. She thought about all of the differences between boys and girls when it came to relationships and emotions. She decided that having a boy would be less of an emotional roller coaster than having a girl. Once she discovered that she was having a little girl she was excited although slightly disappointed. After she had the baby however she grew to realize that in this world, she was very glad that she didn’t have a son.

Briscoe now has two daughters and states that she is thankful that she never had a boy. Every time she turns on the news she sees another story about black boys being shot or killed. She sees that justice usually is not brought upon those who harm these young boys and take their lives at such a young age. She stated that she thanks God all the time for having girls instead of a boy. Briscoe says that she didn’t want to have to explain the underlying message that the media is sending that the lives of these young black boys don’ t matter.

Briscoe lists off the things that she would be worried about should she have had a boy. She said that she would have worried every time he went out the door whether he would come back or not. She would have been scared that he wouldn’t make it to be an adult. She would be scared that he would have gone through profiling. All of these things are what black boys and their mother’s face every single day out in the world.

She now is struggling to talk to her daughters about the world and how prejudice still exists. She wants to tell them about the protests in Ferguson and what they are protesting for but doesn’t want to give them too much information that would make them afraid of police officers. For now she will have to figure out the right words to say and is still thankful that she didn’t have a black son.

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7 Comments

    • What we as black women need to understand that all black children belong to us, it is not only our biological ones….um just sayin’

  1. I feel you, Sustah! But the tragic facts about bigotry, class-ism, hatred, racism and all the other hurdles that Black children must face, must become the pivotal point in our lives as women. They should give us pause before bringing children into this cruel world.

    Before even THINKING about having children, WE need a PLAN!!!

    I’m talking about a thorough, well-thought-out business, economic, home and family plan, that hits heavy on the subjects of education (even if it’s homeschooling in fact, I wish all Black children COULD be home-schooled) entrepreneurship, making quality choices, making money, INVESTING money and leaving a powerful legacy.

    As the saying goes: even “the best laid plans go awry.” Which is all the more reason to stop, look up, ask for help, look around (at where we are, what we’ve got, the direction in which we’re headed, what we DON’T want, what we DO want) and then get back to work on the business of looking ahead, to see how to get from here…to there!

    How to become self-sufficient…how to put our children (not our relationship and sexual needs) first…how to get OUR need for affirmation and self worth validated, so we can properly affirm and validate our children, and how to raise kids who understand how to get beyond LOOKING like they got it going on, to actually HAVING it going on!!!

    It’s time to take our heads out of our posterior when it comes to relationships. And sex. And baby-making. And single parenting. We play Black children too cheap when we focus on their mischief, trouble-making and struggles at school, while neglecting to finding ways to tap into their genius…their passion…their sometimes (hidden) gifts and talents!!

    I want to encourage every Black mother out there to FIND positive programs…and role models…and methods, for tapping into their child’s self worth and passions. Once you do that, half the battle is won. Because a child who feels good about him or herself and has the freedom to explore and express their passion (whether its storytelling, singing, dancing, telling jokes, standing out as a leader among other kids) – whatever it is, will be less inclined to identify with the negative images, goals and mindsets crippling the Black community and the image we’re projecting in society, and cause our kids to choose higher paths and better objectives for themselves!

    Connecting with our children begins at the moment of conception. And so does learning. Any time you have 2 and 3 year olds on YouTube out dancing and out performing Beyonce, singing, reciting, preaching, telling jokes, playing instruments and (unfortunately especially for us), cussing like 60 year old sailors, it speaks to the fact that a child is never too young to learn. Never too young to start training.

    We dare NOT give our children a pass for poor citizenship(behavior -I’m OLD school as you can tell by my use of that word) at school! We dare NOT give them a pass for poor reading, writing and study skills!!! Most of them know all the lyrics to rap and R&B songs by the time they’re 2 and 3 years old…we dare NOT allow them to struggle with the multiplication table!!!

    NOT ACCEPTABLE!!!!

    If we learn how to make our children a priority – not by giving them everything they want but by giving them all that they need to thrive, our little Black boys and girls will be far less prone to engage in behaviors that lead to encounters with the murderers of Black lives – the police. And they up the ante for becoming ambassadors…astronauts…entrepreneurs…executives, congressmen…Fortune 500 business leaders…governors…mayors, politicians and game changers!

    I repeat: sometimes, the best laid plans still go awry. A Black person can be completely innocent and still have their lives cut short by the monsters known as “police”. But we all stand a much better chance at safe passage thru here if we learn to embrace, love and support our kids by teaching them to live purposely, strategically and wisely. Believe me, it’s the last thing our opponent expects. Which then puts our children…way ahead of the game!!!

  2. Pig cops understand that if they start murdering Caucasian males at will like they murder BM their blood will stain the pavement and Amerikkk isn’t prepared for that. Now, it is being reported that the reason for increased police brutality and murder against BM is to decrease the escalating interracial rate between BM and Caucasian women. Caucasian males readily admit they can not control who WW choose to associate with therefore, Caucasian male law enforcement pigs have decided to create tremendous animosity between Black people and Caucasians by singling out BM for attack. Only time will tell if this murder tactic is effective reducing BM/WW relations

    • This is a silly statement because if they want to signal out black males dating or marrying white women, then they need to signal out just the males and it is easy to do look around for those walking around with these women next to them.
      NO, they are having a good time just murdering any black male.

      I will say this, those are the ones they should be going after and they need to go after the white women that lay up with this.

      I would honestly have no problem with they went after black garbage like this but unfortunately, it just isn’t so.

  3. The bottom line is that we put guns in the hands of fools who don’t believe that God exists and takes vengeance even when their victims can’t.

    God knows that I’m so glad that I’m not white! I don’t want to insult and disobey my Creator by thinking more highly of myself than I ought.

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