Wendy Williams: Why I Stayed After My Husband Cheated

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wendy and hubbyBy Nomalanga Mhlauli-Moses

Wendy Williams is emerging as the new “Queen of Talk” with her talk show in which she regularly discusses other people’s “dirt”. Now the talk show diva is discussing her own relationship with her husband,Kevin Hunter. The couple have been married for 14 years.

As successful as Wendy is, right now, one would think that a cheating husband would be enough for her to kick him to the curb, like most celebrities tend to do. But Wendy decided to take a different route and stay with her husband in spite of finding out about his cheating.

In a recent interview with VLAD TV, Wendy shared that the affair that her husband had was 12 years ago, when she had just had her son and she says that, even though she realizes it sounds like a cliche, it has made their marriage stronger. She also says that she loves her husband and he loves her and they decided together that they would reveal the story. She shared the story in a 2001 autobiography.

Says Wendy,

“If you told me when I was twenty five years old or thirty years old that I would stay around for a cheater, I would have been like ‘you’s a lie.’ I’ve got way too much to offer a man to stick around for him cheating on me, you know? At that particular time I had my career in radio, I was making a great salary, I had vacation property of my very own and the world was my oyster, so I definitely thought I wasn’t staying around for some cheating. But I did and I don’t regret it.”

Wendy says that they addressed the issue head on. The funny part is that she went on to say that she thinks that anyone who cheats should never confess that they cheated to their partner because it only hurts them. She does however say that if you get caught (which is what happened to her husband), then it is best to just confess.

The other point that Wendy made was that when she found out her husband was cheating, she had just had her son, implying that maybe that was a very significant part of why she stayed.

The question I often get asked is if I think that a relationship can be healthy after cheating has taken place. My answer is, yes, but that does not apply to everyone. For some people, it will work, if they do the work it takes to restore their union and for yet others, they can forgive and forget but they choose not to put themselves in a position where something like that can happen again.

The best advice that I can give is that if you’re the one who was cheated on, whether you decide to stay or leave, forgive and forget either way.

Nomalanga helps Black women thrive in their lives and careers. She is a Social Commentator, an Editor at Your Black World , a former College Professor and the reigning Mrs Botswana. Visit Nomalanga’s Facebook page or Follow her on Twitter  

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86 Comments

  1. Willard ChillWill Armstrong on

    Word going around Wendy cheated also. Her husband wasnt the only one doing the cheating. She needs to be more honest with herself. And quit spreading nasty dirt about people personal lives.

  2. One would have never thought! this woman right here knows other people's weaknesses and uses them to make money for big fatty right here….i knew there was something behind the boldness! HUBBY IS A CHEAT!

  3. Belen A. Diaz on

    Cheating is never good but if you are both truthful and want to make it work, I believe you can. But believe that it won't be easy

  4. Wow everyone will cheat or get cheated on in this life just my feelings …… I know that I have grown up because back in my younger years my motto was don't get mad get even…… Now I know that's the wrong thing to do

  5. Bruce Levern Stevenson on

    Most of the time getting even just feels stupid! Just make a decision to move on and make the marriage work or give it up! Simple as that…!

  6. Hassan Hartley on

    Wendy will use anything in her life to engender sympathy….I was over her the moment she flaunted her being a recovering crackhead( GLAD YOU PUT DOWN THE PIPE, SIS)…She judges other people but likes to spin her faults in a way to make people feel sorry for her….personally I ran out of ***** to give about her…..NEXT.

    • I refuse to do a cheater, its just real nasty where all is concerned. Some people are not looking at the big picture. Yuk Yuk…. filthy nasty!!! A shower or soak don’t clean away one d@mn thing!

  7. Shirley Gallagher on

    Good for wendy if she and her husband were able to work it out, but a lot of womens are unable to trust their Husband again, and that where the problem comes in, because everytime he is late you mind will start racing thinking if he is cheating again.
    I don't if Wendy is a Strong woman, or a Woman of strenght because their is a different in the two.
    I couldbn't stay in good faith, I had to leave a cheating husband, and move forward.

  8. Sandra Mclaurin on

    y not stay with a cheater? once u get a new man he is going to do the same thing. better u stick with the evil you already know.

  9. Angelene Frederick on

    Happened to me and it was refreshing! I know that sounds crazy but it made my husband human in my eyes. I did not have to catch him and that is the beauty of it, because if I did, then I would probably be in jail today :) However, our relationship is so much better, it set me free in a sense. NO, I have never cheated on him and never intend too. But now we know, don't even say what you will not do, because you may just do it with the right circumstances. That was husband #? LOL

  10. I always knew that she was insecure. that is why she always talks about others’ weaknesses and gossips. It is a way of pushing down others to make her feel more superior. That is why she has gotten all that plastic surgery. What if the real reason she is staying in the marriage is her own insecurity?

    • I think you have understood something so very true. She has to push others down to feel better about herself, but you know what? In the end…she will never be happy, but she might ruin a lot of lives and relationships on her way to try to feel better about herself, and that is just plain BAD :-(

    • Why do she have to be insecure when a whole lot of people stay with their cheating mates? My man cheated on me before and I took him back it’s because I loved him and nobody is perfect show me 1 person that have made no mistakes in life

    • Sistagirl from the Boogie Down Bronx on

      I think you are really on to something here ERIC MATTERSON… Now, how you doing?

  11. It would so nice if one day sister Wendy came out in an Afro wig eh.And listen if you here all them guests say, How You Doing?

  12. It is a difficult decision to make when you have kids and get cheated on, you just have to do what is best for you and your family.

  13. I am so sorry but I would not care if I had several kids..2 dogs …4 cats and **** house mortgage.I WOULD BE GONE!I could ever forgive a cheater.To me that is not love.I don’t know how in the world him cheating on you would make any relationship stronger.The detestation would not allow me to ever trust his sorry **** again.Without trust there is nothing.

    • What kinda B.S is this “Get caught confess, If not be quiet c.r.a.p.”… While she’s snitching broadcasting every & anybody’s business.. Wendell or Wendy has to many accessorised parts for her stuff to be good, .. Any woman witb “PAID” for body parts can’t be physically offering.. Why don’t she confess to that… He’d have to be man with demons to put with that kind of selfish insecurity..

      • TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE~! GROW UP & GET A LIFE…..SCUMBAG! WENDY IS BEAUTIFUL!!!! AND YOU ARE JUST JEALOUS!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

  14. Every relationship is different & I think it's based on how they work at the rebuilding of their trust/honesty/devotion & all that entails a healthy medium. It has to be what both people want. cheating is a powerful drug that can possibley spiral toward the end.

  15. Please, That Jamican intern from WBLS sued her husband like 6yrs ago for ****** harassment. They settle out of court. They’re public records…….. look it up!! New York, New York. My ppl let me read the public document. Smh….. So sad….. It was Wild!!

    • Don’t be so nasty. Wendy is alright and now she is shooting for the stars. Make that money.
      If you love someone than try to make it work. There are so many lonely sistas out here, by themselves because of unforgiving and pride. Mad at the world because they are bringing up kids all alone. We must stop and regroup and try to be “HAPPY”.

  16. Brigette Holman on

    I commend you Wendy for sticking in there to make your marriage work. I was married just shy of a year and found out that my husband was cheating. But what do you do when your spouse lies to you, and on you so that the other woman doesn’t find out what he is really about? I had to forgive but it is very hard.

  17. I love my man to death. he forgave me for cheating on him, so I would feel obligated to forgive him, but I just pray that it doesn’t come to that

  18. I LET MY EX-HUSBAND HAVE HIS SPACE 9 MONTHS AGO TO SEARCH OUT HIS ROYAL OATS , OH HE CAME RUNING BACK , HE FOUND OUT THE WORLD DIDN'T WANT HIM AS MUCH AS HE WANTED THE WORLD . EITHER WAY I'M THE WINNER NOT THE LOSER IN THIS TOURNAMENT , IT TURNS OUT THE GRASS WASN'T GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE AS HE FOUND OUT , I KNEW HE WOULD BE BACK , I CLAIM HIM HE IS MINE & ALWAYS WILL BE , I FORGAVE HIM WHOLE HEARTEDLY AFTER CHASING PROSTITUTES , I WILL ALWAYS LOVE HIM , GOD GAVE ME A BEATING AS WELL . I HAD TO TAKE HIM BACK , I DON'T THINK HE WILL BE LEAVING NO MORE , HE IS MINE ! :-) :-)

  19. Dominique Elexis Webb on

    I'M HAPPY FOR U AUNTY…..U DESERVE THE BEST…..YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL STRONG BLACK WOMAN…..THEY SAY EVERY WOMAN DESERVES A GUD MAN!!! :-)

  20. Wendy or William like to put down blacks but put the whites on a cloud an call them ( friends in her mind ). She uses the word ( ghetto ) all the time but she snorkel,pull on her bra and brush her teeth with her fingers… Crackhead tendacies..

  21. Doesn't matter if it was 12 seconds ago! Many women decide to give their cheating SO's another chance. My experience has been that those who have broken trust will not go the distance or put in the work necessary to regain that trust! Having said thar, personally once you break my trust, I ghost you!

  22. William H Leonard on

    It is said that their no excuse of cheating. If you are accuse of cheating and told because they think you have cheated you will not get any *** for week at a time. The accusation that you are accuse of could never happen if you tried. Just asking? I say if you find out why he/she cheated then you can work on your marriage and this will take some doing on both sides. Only the person who go cheated on can decide if the marriage should continue.

  23. The only thing about staying is that the marriage is a like a crack plate no amout of glue can ever put it back the way it was you may still have the plate but the crack is still there but geunine and true love can cover a multitude of things be it infidelity or some other serious matter.So I applaude all of those who stay beyond the storm clouds and try too work things out.

  24. I am the same way…like my papi always told my sister and I.."if he do it to you once…he'll do it to you again". So if you cheat? Cool…I am OUT! Been there…done that.

    • Unwrap This Gift on

      I believe wholeheartedly that once a cheat always a cheat is not always true. People have the capacity to change. Whether they do or not is another story. There have been those who cheated and regretted it -to never do it again. No, I have never cheated neither have my hubby, as far as I know. But I tell you one thing, I am not wracking my nerves worrying about whether he is or not. If I find out he is, according to the circumstances he might be forgiven. If Wendy decided to forgive, then that is her and their marriage. Who are we to judge?

  25. WHAT ABOUT MARRIED WOMEN HAVING A BABY BY ANOTHER MAN. AIN’T NOBODY SAYING NOTHING ABOUT THAT.

    WHY DO YOU THINK SO MANY MILITARY MEN GO CRAZY WHEN THEY COME BACK FROM A TOUR OF DUTY OVER SEAS AND THEIR WIFE ARE GIRL FRIEND HAS HAD A BABY BY SOME SPINELESS COWARD!!!

  26. anyone who enjoys others who are mentally and spiritually screwed up is messed up themselves – mentally and spiritually – and anyone who follows her and watches her. – she – her crew – her audience and her followers all need to find JESUS and start helping to SOLVE the problems – instead of gossiping about them.

  27. Only timI think its all BS. She gossips about others to not put the spotlight on her hypocritical ***. He is taken care of. I would work it out too.

    I don’t believe that was the only time.

  28. patricia taylor on

    my ex-husband carried on a secret affair for more than 7 yrs with his ex-wife..i felt so violated and hurt. HELLO???? i divorced him!!!
    Now he can cheat on the next woman…cheaters never change…they just get slicker…

    • @Patricia you ain’t lying I agree and the thing about the situation is you might forgive the person but you will never forget and things will never be the same. If it were me I would leave too because I think too much and I would always have the thought of his cheating *** in my head.

  29. Right on. Some people cannot get over the pain and will refuse to take the path to forgiveness. I am sometimes amazed at these women who suggest that only the man can make a mistake, whether is is cheating or any other breach of trust.

  30. Dionne Marie Cooper on

    Well Wendy…as you say, it doesn't work for everyone. I could have forgiven my husband for cheating, but not for bringing two babies into this world with other women…That's why our marriage couldn't work. I had just helped him pay off the child support for his older kids and in the mail here comes a summons for a baby that was already 1 1/2 old…When I thought we were doing ok in our marriage, he was out and about having a good time without strapping up! I guess he didn't care about himself or me! I still love my x-husband but! Been divorced for 1 year now…Good luck Wendy to you and your husband..Hopefully he won't try that again!

  31. Katrina McCrary on

    Chasing prostitutes? I hope you both have gone for STD/HIV testing. Don't love someone so much that you are willing to gamble with your life…your loved ones need you

  32. How you doin… Wendy? She's an entertainer and I don't take her serious. I like most people am entertained by the lives of the rich and famous. As shameful as it is people are drawn to what she provides. Gossip! I could but I won't hate on her for being a scandalous entertaining provocateur.

  33. WOW Wendy that ead deep and yes you must first forgive for yourself not for the other party. The forgiveness makes you better. Then when you forget and let it go it is just a beautiful thing.

  34. There is a bridge that no one deemed to miss. We in today's society tend to forget vows made to God. Flesh may not honor them, but vows made to God does. I read that 1 sister said "If both are truthful and want to make it work, than we who are believers and non-believers should encourage them and others. Thanks Ms. Belen A. Diaz for that word of encouragement. TheElderSpeaks.

  35. Kwame Christian on

    Wendy also has the audacity to say the person who cheated should never confess to their parnter because it will hurt them? So compound lies with more lies? Be more deceitful? Keep a very big secret hidden between the two? Yes, it is hurtful but as soon as you committed that filthy deed you opened the door to a world of hurt and pain to your parnter. Thats what the cheater wants you to do: to not know, to keep it hidden and to govtocthe grave with that secret. Thats foolish advice, and humiliating to the cheated on panrter, weather they know or not!

  36. Lorraine Currelley on

    If it's working for you fine. I hope you made him get STD testing specifically HIV & AIDS before reentering your bed!

  37. I believe that if you really love someone… that Love covers a multitude of sins. You can get through it and live on. But you have to forgive and forget and work through the infidelity together. Those vows do mean what they say. Through richer or poorer, sickness and in health, till death do US part. Amen

  38. I believe that Love covers a multitude of sins…. If you really love someone, and they are willing to change and have repented of there sins…. You can work through anything. Those vows mean exactly what they said…. Through richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do US part. Marriage is hard work and if your not willing to work at it than don't get in it……I was told or taught that Marriage is Ministry.

  39. Veronica Hall on

    YOU ACTUALLY ON HERE BRAGGING ABOUT THAT HE WAS CHASING HOOKERS AND U SCREAMIN HE'S MINE BLACK WOMEN ARE RUINED ! YOUR EXACTLY RIGHT HE'S ALL YOURS UNTIL HE READY TO GO HOOKIN AGAIN! TONI WILSON YOU SOUND STUPID REAL STUPID

  40. I believe you have to keep lying to yourself to continue in a relationship where you’ve been cheated on. The saying “one a cheat is and will always be a cheat” is so true. If the relationship means anything to them, they will just cover their tracks better. And this goes for women alike, cheating women are at a all time high.

  41. I so loved reading everyone comments, well my husband cheated on me,he said he didnt sleep with anyone so he didn’t call it cheating, yes we married, and i trust in the Lord he said if he forgives us why not forgive others,so i did it was hard,but we got threw it,and now he dont want to loose me,cause he see that i walking by Gods word andnow im bring him closer. ..

    • My husband had an emotional affair with his ex from high school and I was devastated! Funny but I believe it would have hurt less if he would have just slept with her and moved on…. We had to work really hard to rebuild the trust in our relationship (which included couples counseling), and it taught us each about taking the relationship for granted. I don’t believe that all marriages are over just because infidelity has occurred, it depends on how much work the couple especially the guilty party is willing to put in!

  42. I STAYED TOO BECAUSE WHEN I TRIED TO LEAVE IT FELT LIKE SOMEONE IWAS TEARING MY HEART APART WITH A KNIFE. NOW THAT HE IS DECEASED I AM GLAD THAT I STUCK IT OUT BECAUSE I LEARNED WHAT REAL LOVE WAS ALL ABOUT.

  43. Pingback: Ladies Is Cheating A Deal Breaker? Wendy Williams Says No….What Are YOUR Thoughts? | Cullen's Corner

  44. my husband cheated on me with many women, i found out from one that he got her pregnant. so i divorced him and never looked back. i am now with a good man. they cheat once, they can do again and next time you will never know. best thing i did was walk away to find my true happiness.

  45. I have always told myself that I would leave if he ever cheated. Now I have two kids and I want to leave but I fear brining another man into my kids lives. If I act upon my heart, I would leave. But if I think about my children, I stay. Its a sad situation.

  46. Marie howell on

    People can always say what they would or would not do.you don’t know what you would do of you was in that position. It’s easy to say what you would do if not in that situation. Don’t be too quick to judge. She might of stayed with him,but what distasteful thing have you done and is still doing.

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