By: Krystle Crossman
Marriage is not for everyone. Some people thrive when they are in a fully committed relationship to one another with the rings on their fingers and the piece of paper that states that they are legally husband and wife. Other people however get married and then are miserable. They either end up remaining miserable because they don’t want to be divorced or they give up and get the divorce. A s*x therapist and writer, Anthony D’Ambrosio, says that in modern times marriage really doesn’t work anymore and here is why:
1. Finances – Today’s cost of living is a lot higher than it used to be. Houses cost on average $300,000 for a modest home depending on the area you live in. Some are much more than that. It’s expensive to go to college, to raise kids, to buy a car, and to maintain your home. There are so many different expenses that come into play. Finances are often one of the biggest reasons that people begin to fight in a marriage. They become crippled with financial debt and then the stress takes a toll on the marriage.
2. Social media – Dirty laundry is aired out for the world to see on Facebook. We are always taking photos and putting them on social media. We check into places that we go. We make sure that everyone knows where we are and what we are doing at all time. There is no privacy most of the time because of social media. This can cause a great strain because when one spouse is upset about something and takes it to social media they are not respecting the privacy of the other party and they are also trying to invoke drama among their friends.
3. Physical connections – Let’s be honest, when you get married s*x pretty much goes out the window after a while. This is especially true after you have children. Not all marriages lack a good s*x life but many do and it takes a toll on the relationship. It shouldn’t be the most important part of a marriage but everyone needs that physical connection with another person at one time or another.
4. Attention – Social media ties into this as well. Many people love posting photos of their “happy” lives for the world to see. The problem is that even if they aren’t happy they feel like they need to prove to their friends that they have the best life. This creates an environment where they are only caring about what other people think of them instead of living their lives they way they want to and focusing on their partner. They are so worried that other people are going to see that they may not have as much money as others or may not be as happy all of the time so they develop a fake personality to gain attention at the expense of their spouse.
5. Technology – Remember the days when people would sit around the dinner table to eat and have a conversation? Those days are gone thanks to how connected we are with everyone else except those in front of us. Anywhere you go, even restaurants and clubs, you will see people on their phones instead of talking to those around them.