Would You Marry an Athlete Who Has 12 Kids with 8 Different Women?

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dsioidisdoBy Staff Blogger

Antonio Cromartie of the New York Jets is everything that many women desire:  Rich, famous, tall, handsome and athletic.  He also seems to have some skills in the bedroom, since most of the mothers of his 12 children don’t have many complaints about him as a person or as a lover.

Cromartie  recently made news by announcing that he is turning over a new leaf.  After admitting to serious financial irresponsibility, he says that he is going to build a new life and future for himself.  He has turned in extravagance for a more frugal lifestyle and says that he wants to put his family in a good situation for the long-term.  He is now married and expecting twins.

So, we can first say “good for him.”   A man should do right by his family, and he is certainly trying to do that.

But then there is a question:  Is he a good man or damaged goods?

Most people come into relationships with some kind of baggage, but not this much.  Cromartie likely pays thousands per month in child support already and is bringing in tons of baby mama drama to boot.  He can easily afford the child support now, but many athletes find themselves going bankrupt after their short NFL careers come to an end.  He is nearly 30 years old and NFL players don’t usually last past the age of 33.  So, what happens after that?

Then, there are the physical and mental health issues.  A man has to have a lot of unprotected sex in order to make 12 kids with eight women.  That means he was sleeping around with quite a few women and not always being smart about protecting his body.  Since HIV, HPV and Herpes infections are rampant in the black community (actor Michael Douglas just admitted that he got HPV-related throat cancer from oral s-ex), this says that it is nearly impossible for a man with this much s-exual experience to enter into a marriage with a clean bill of health.

Finally, there are the mental health issues.  If a man is getting around this much and he has this much access to beautiful women, what are the odds that he’s going to be faithful?  Making love is one thing, but when does it become an obsession?  One athlete, Winston Bennett, said that because he was a tall, handsome basketball player who met a lot of women, he slept with 90 women per month.  Yes, that’s over 1,000 women per year, with a lot of these women being the kinds who would sleep with a man in a Burger King bathroom.  A lot of athletes sleep with more women in three months than an average man sleeps with over the course of his entire life.  With all the women that are chasing these men, is it a surprise that there is an STD crisis in the African American community?

So, this begs the final question:  Is that handsome, rich athlete the dreamboat you were taught to believe he is, or does he bring trouble into your life?  It’s up to you to decide, but we encourage you to think outside the box.

 

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12 Comments

  1. Renee Aldridge on

    I say it is disgusting! but this is what we as Black women have to deal with if we want the tall dark and handsome Black man, by the time he tries to settle down most likely he will have baggage and that is what society has created is a lot of garbage to carry baggage around so sad!

  2. Well trust is a vital part of a relationship, although often this seems to be forgotten. However, he may have greater resistance to being unfaithful because he’s “been there, done that,” and with that kind of a track record, I’m sure temptation would not be the issue, unless he’s an addict. In regard to STD’s, I think all couples should get tested together and have the results given them TOGETHER as a part of the trust pact between them prior to having sex, which many don’t think to do or STD’s would not be running rampant in the black community. If he was not coerced into making the changes that he has announced, I’d say he’s past the childish stage and the novelty of being “that guy,” and is sincere with this choice. If it was coerce by the bride or anyone else, then it may not last. I think the wife must be willing to share him with the children as it is for the positive mental and emotional health of the children.

  3. Quetta Harden on

    I would rather date/marry a man with 12 kids/8bm that actually takes care of ALL 12 kids than a man with 2 kids/2bm that don't do SH! T. <—we all know THAT guy.

  4. I’m pretty sure that if the roles were reversed and the person with 12 kids by 8 different guys no man would even think about marrying her. So i think the same should be said for a man in the same situation.

  5. No it’s to much of a responsibility for me. Dealing with 8 baby momas and it’s always drama when it comes to dealing with women. 12 kids OMG. You just making a name for yourself. We as black women aand men we need to slow down within ourselves and have respect for ourselves. What all looks good, feels good, it’s not good.

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