By: Krystle Crossman
Marriages are meant to last a lifetime. New couples like to hear advice from older couples who have made it through decades of marriage with the same person. They have great insight on how to sustain a happy and healthy relationship. Here are three tips from couples who have been married for over 50 years:
1. When you are about to fight, make a sandwich – This may sound crazy but it actually works. How many times have you become so hungry that you become angry at every little thing that is going on? If you and your partner are about to have a fight take a time out at eat something before you get into it. You will be able to have a more calm and rational discussion when your blood sugar isn’t at a low point and when you have a stomach that isn’t growling. It may seem almost impossible to stop a fight to make a sandwich but it will be worth it in the end.
2. Timing – Timing is everything when it comes to a difficult conversation. If you have something to say and you know it is going to create conflict or even start a big fight you need to make sure that you are bringing it up at the right time to avoid something bigger. Gauge your partner’s mood and make sure that they are not in an angry or a tense mood to start with as things will just escalate that much quicker. Also weigh in on the amount of distraction that your spouse has at the time that you want to talk. If they have brought their work home with them or they are dealing with some major crisis from a friend it may not be the best time to bring the conversation up as they are not going to have the energy or concentration to really hear what you have to say.
3. Take a break from the argument – When you do get into an argument and it is getting really heated the best thing that you can do is take a break so that you can both clear your minds and calm down. If you continue to drag the situation out when you are both frustrated beyond belief it can make things much worse than they could be. Take some time to think and reflect on the argument and try to come up with a solution.